“You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry…”

ELITE 24
The second annual Elite 24 high school showcase — which brings 24 of the best ballplayers in the country regardless of class or sneaker-company loyalties — is tonight at Rucker Park, and yesterday some of us dropped by the scrimmage/media session in the gym at Columbia University (where Bounce’s own Sean Couch used to put opposing guards on lock) … Before the players hit the court, they got some words of wisdom from a list of guest speakers that included Baron Davis, Larry Johnson (Grandmama, not the beast tailback), John Starks, Tark the Shark and a high-energy Lawrence Frank. Also in the house was Marcus Williams, Kevin Love and Kelenna Azubuike, but they were just there to watch … We haven’t seen LJ in a minute; he looks like he’s in great shape. He’s the anti-Barkley as far as post-retirement shape … A few times during Tark’s speech he half-jokingly got on Baron about not working hard all the time, and drew some laughs when he said “Stacey Augmon couldn’t shoot — he still can’t shoot” and that ex-UNLV big man George Ackles “couldn’t hit the floor” when it came to shooting … After the pep talks, the high schoolers went through a light practice and then a full 48-minute scrimmage. Some of the standouts:

Tyreke Evans — Obviously we’re big ‘Reke fans, seeing as he’s graced two Dime covers before his senior year’s even begun. Yesterday he was unstoppable when he wanted to be, using that lethal first-step and clown-making step-back move to drop buckets on the comp.

Lance Stephenson — He was on cruise control until crosstown NYC rival Sylvan Landesberg flipped his switch with some aggressive chest-to-chest D. Lance proceeded to go to work on Sylvan, toying with him off the dribble and one time getting a nasty cuff on the Queens-bred senior. “Not in my city,” Lance told us afterwards.

Brandon Jennings — The best and most creative PG in America makes all-star games like this worth watching. Jennings was setting everyone up on lobs and making some crazy passes throughout. In last year’s Elite 24 he dropped 15 dimes and had our man Bobbito buggin’ on the mic. Expect the same this year.

Dexter Strickland — The Steve Nash camp must have done Strick well, because every time we see him he looks more and more like a true point guard. He was hitting all the right spots with his passes yesterday and showed off a crisper handle.

Samardo Samuels — Kid is a beast. Listed at 6-9, 270, he looks like he’s slimmed down since last year’s Elite 24 and was running the floor all day for some loud finishes.

John Riek — The NY-via-Sudan seven footer is legit. The first thing you notice about Riek are his arms: every “tie his shoes without bending over” and “get money from his sock without moving” joke applies here. More than just his physique, though, Riek loves playing D and wants to block every shot that comes into his lane. He’s gonna be a pro.

B.J. Mullens — While Lance vs. Landesberg was pretty one-sided, the most competitive 1-on-1 yesterday was Riek vs. Mullens. Mullens is a little taller and thicker than Riek, and the Ohio State committed senior has a more polished offensive game. Mullens had a few shots blocked by Riek, but also dunked in his grill a few times. B.J. has three-point range, but kept it strictly in the paint on Tuesday with some grown-man post moves.

Jrue Holiday — A foot injury kept us from seeing Jrue in action at the adidas Nations camp in San Francisco a few months ago (when he made the cover of Dime #34), but he was healthy and doing his thing yesterday. The UCLA commit had it on cruise control most of the time, but you can see the talent. One time he busted out a baseline in-and-out that was a straight pro move.

Xavier Henry — Big, strong two-guard with a feathery jumper. Xavier was one of the few guys consistently sticking his threes during drills and in the scrimmage, and he showed he can drive and score inside. Another guy with pro potential written all over him.

Kenny Boynton Jr. — The other guy who was on-fire from deep. We’re calling it now; Boynton’s shoot-first point guard game will make him a favorite to cop MVP in tonight’s game. He’s gonna have the ball in his hands a lot, and he’s gonna fire it up a lot.

Demar DeRozan — He brought the house down in the scrimmage’s last two minutes. With fellow Cali native Jennings setting the table, Demar unleashed some cringe-worthy alley oop finishes to put a capper on the day. The East Coast onlookers were all like “Who is that?”