Smack / Jan 4, 2008 / 5:43 am

Capt. Jack

By Dime Magazine

Although Bulls vs. Blazers — real life, not the suuuuper slooow-mo video game — turned into a match game between Ben Gordon and Brandon Roy for most of crunch time, the eventual heroes/goats ended up being the unlikely Jarrett Jack and Joe Smith. In double-OT, Jack got the go-ahead bucket when he converted a three-point play with 19 seconds left, and when Smith got himself to the free throw line on the other end, Jack walked over to him and said something — a la LeBron/Arenas or Pippen/Malone if they were super-nice guys and had been joking around — to Joe about those shots. It looked harmless, but then Joe bricked the second freebie and set the wheels in motion for Chicago to lose … Jack was miked for the game, and after the go-ahead shot he popped up from the ground yelling “Let’s go! It’s my — uh, it’s our game!” … Regulation belonged to Roy (25 pts, 11 asts, 6 rebs, 2 stls) and Gordon (32 pts, 5 rebs). In BG’s case, how many other sixth men can say they have their team’s crunch-time offense running entirely through them? Further reason he shouldn’t have any problem with his current situation. Granted, last night was a little different because Luol Deng (foot) was hurt and Kirk Hinrich couldn’t throw it in the ocean (5-for-18 FGs), but BG is never lacking for minutes and shots … Despite the missed FT late, how good was Joe Smith? He took it back to College Park, putting up 31 points, 11 boards and 4 blocks. While you’d like to say Tyrus Thomas should be getting minutes, you can’t justify it when Joe is playing this well … All night we were trying to figure out that tattoo on Joe’s right shoulder. It looked like the Liberty Bell with “Unit” under it. Turns out Joe owns a record label called Nova Unity and that was the company logo … Sobering sight if you’re a Knicks fan: With the game on the line and Portland drawing up plays in the huddle, Channing Frye was off to the side in his warmups, an afterthought, looking like he was planning his next vacation. That was the guy once seen as untouchable in New York … Has Adrian Griffin only been in the League 9 years? It seems more like 14 or 15 … Between Tyrus, Joe, Ben Wallace and BG, the Bulls are a pretty inked-up team. But they’re not on level with the Nuggets (A.I., ‘Melo, J.R. Smith, K-Mart, Camby, Anthony Carter) and Knicks (Curry, Marbury, Nate, Crawford, Wilson Chandler, Q) yet … And who said those Nuggets don’t play defense? They held the Spurs below 80 points yesterday — it was literally Duncan, Parker and Finley scoring while NOBODY else did anything. Kinda the same thing for Denver, though: Iverson had 29, ‘Melo had 17, and everyone else just filled in their roles … Did you see those commercials during the TNT broadcast for that show “Ocean Force”? So we’re making reality rip-offs of “Baywatch” now? That’s sad … Leading into Suns/Sonics, the cameras caught Amare arriving to the arena wearing some extra-brolic Eagle Scout’s uniform shirt … Then they showed Steve Nash rocking an orange headband during warmups. No, no, no, no. The Suns were all wearing the headbands to commemorate the team’s 40th anniversary. Of course, no one was wearing headbands on the court 40 years ago (as far as we know). Clearly the move offended the basketball gods, as Phoenix got blitzed from the tip and were down by 20 at the end of the first, failing to get an assist in the first quarter and shooting 4-for-20. The headbands were finito after that … And of course, the Sonics blew the lead and found themselves down by 15 at one point in the second half. They made it close at the end, but they just don’t have the weapons to battle Phoenix unless it’s their absolute worst night … Amare ended up with 34 points and 11 boards. Durant scored 28 … Charles Barkley did his “Fave 5″ thing on his favorite Suns’ players of all-time, and didn’t show any love for Rex Chapman. OK, we’re a little biased since we’d just caught a replay of that famous Suns/Sonics game from ‘97 when Rex hit the impossible running three to send it to OT. One thing we’d forgotten about that game when it actually happened was how many times the cameras zoomed in on Kevin Johnson’s mom. It was worse than your usual Eva Longoria/Spurs game … As you may have already read in Dime #38 (the Shaq issue), we went out to Stephon Marbury’s home in New York and talked to the controversial/legendary PG about the public’s perception of him, his beef with the NY media and his legacy. Come back to the site later today where we’ll have the behind-the-scenes video of Steph’s Dime photo shoot … We’re out like “Baywatch” rip-offs …

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50 Responses to “Capt. Jack”

  1. January 4th, 2008 at 5:51 am

    first says:

    sorry srt8baller :)

  2. January 4th, 2008 at 6:00 am

    YOUNGFED says:

    Did Dime really mention Anthony Carter (LOL) he’s trash?

  3. January 4th, 2008 at 7:13 am

    str8baller says:

    didn’t hear the damn alarm. Hehehe. There’s always tomorrow.

  4. January 4th, 2008 at 7:48 am

    real man says:

    now that the three ladies of the sewing circle have chimed in, let’s talk some hoops….

    The Celtics look legit. Are they destined for a second half of the season collapse?

    The Spurs look like junk and Detroit is on a ROLL.

    I don’t see the Mavs or Suns doin’ shit in the post season, and no one from the East is rising up if I haven’t mentioned them above.

    someone drop some knowledge on us

  5. January 4th, 2008 at 7:58 am

    SOUSS says:

    Just a random unrelated thought watching these highlights
    http://youtube.com/watch?v=3zIULG3IbiE

    Does anyone even come close to VC as far entertainement and spectular plays!!

  6. January 4th, 2008 at 8:02 am

    Abd As-Salaam says:

    There are no baketball gods, there is only one true GOD, let get that straight.

  7. January 4th, 2008 at 8:42 am

    nig says:

    okok there is only one god okok please dont bomb us now

  8. January 4th, 2008 at 9:13 am

    QQ says:

    AI is just straight BALLIN right now. I’m confused, is this Melo’s or A.I’s team? Cause it convincingly looks like the latter’s.

  9. January 4th, 2008 at 9:16 am

    Austin Burton says:

    More entertaining than Vince?

    1. Shawn Kemp
    2. “HOT SIZZLE! Ohhhhh baby! Look at da Sizzle! Look at da Sizzle! Ahhhhhhhhh!”

  10. January 4th, 2008 at 9:21 am

    YOUNGFED says:

    3 ladies of the what circle thats so “Ha Ha” not funny and lame. What kinda guy calls himself real man anyway you must be from somewhere with a total population of 1000. But still I like when haters hate so keep it coming. and QQ AI is the man on any team he goes to.

    I’m out like hopefully the snitches in baseball soon will be. Holla!!!

  11. January 4th, 2008 at 9:30 am

    QQ says:

    I guess they have to trade Melo. The Knicks are a good choice which will definitely make use of his inside… Oh wait. Nevermind.

  12. January 4th, 2008 at 9:40 am

    dagwaller says:

    Trading Melo and saying that the Spurs are dead are kind of premature…

  13. January 4th, 2008 at 9:45 am

    QQ says:

    Dag, i’m just playing man. Knicks, melo? Get it? Sarcasm, man.

  14. January 4th, 2008 at 9:49 am

    Amar says:

    I really thought the nuggets would have lost to the spurs, oh well. there’s always the 1st round of the playoffs for them to do that in though . . .

  15. January 4th, 2008 at 9:51 am

    waiting2repeat says:

    Damon Stoudemire wants out of Memphis. They might even buy him out.

    If he’s not a total A-hole, he could be the perfect Spurs back-up. Pop just has to convince him that if rookie Mike Conley took your starting point guard job, you may have lost a step.

    Pop needs to tell Damon “Come with us…. We win rings….. you can get you some bling….. but your ass is Tony Parker’s back-up, okay?”

  16. January 4th, 2008 at 9:57 am

    Ian says:

    spurs r dead (injuries no manu no barry) ????? yeah right. lets c what happens to your legit celtics in the finals

  17. January 4th, 2008 at 9:57 am

    dagwaller says:

    Ha, my bad QQ. It’s early for me.

    Damon Stoudamire isn’t a starter anymore, that’s for sure. I don’t know what he’s on. Does he really think that the last couple of seasons with him at the helm really made a bunch of people sit up and take notice of the Grizz? No, that’s a YOUNG team, and they need to play. It’d be nice if they had a veteran presence to help them through the process (although I’ve heard that stuff is overrated; see: Portland Trailblazers), but he’s been through a lot already, so maybe he’s ready to be on a winner.

  18. January 4th, 2008 at 10:09 am

    isotope says:

    Lets start this trade rumor:
    Melo to Rockets
    TMac to Denver

  19. January 4th, 2008 at 10:15 am

    QQ says:

    ^Can do. But I still want Melo to the knicks.

  20. January 4th, 2008 at 10:22 am

    Str8baller says:

    just wondering…

    why is Andrea Nocioni ALWAYS CONTESTING DUNKS? He gets dunked on more than anybody I can remember besides Ewing and Shawn Bradley.

    Andrea… we dig your game and what not, but you’re not a 7 footer. But I guess you like the feelin of being on other people’s posters. Last night it was Aldridge.

  21. January 4th, 2008 at 10:27 am

    QQ says:

    That’s the only way Nocioni can appear in posters.

  22. January 4th, 2008 at 10:28 am

    djKianoosh says:

    no, if you want to really start a trade rumor, you gotta think big. how about Kobe for AI? eh? ehhhh??

    spurs are sleepwalking right now. they never get in gear until they make that long road trip around the all star break.

    i love that the knicks suck. being from philly that just delights me to no end.

    celtics are beating teams they’re supposed to beat and going .500 against the top competition. let’s see how they do with the Texas 3 Step + Phoenix.

  23. January 4th, 2008 at 10:42 am

    Ian says:

    isotope hehe u wish tmac sucks
    u want him off your team

  24. January 4th, 2008 at 11:01 am

    isotope says:

    Ian, how about TMac for Ginobilli and Finley? :)

  25. January 4th, 2008 at 11:01 am

    JDish says:

    What’s up, I’m new this post. So bare with me.

    I had a question. What does Dime mean with DNP-CD?
    I seen this reference more than a few times on smack articles…

    I like today’s mention of Channing Frye, guy off to the side planning his vacation. Aren’t players supposed to be supportive even if they’re warming the bench. And wasn’t this guy like the best back-up or something…

  26. January 4th, 2008 at 11:07 am

    isotope says:

    DNP-CD = Did Not Play-Coach’s Decision. Thats when a player is benched for the whole game and the only reason we know is that the coach decided.

  27. January 4th, 2008 at 11:07 am

    Str8baller says:

    J Dish..

    Did Not Play. Coach’s Decision

    Frye better hope for a trade cause with Oden back next year, Aldridge will switch to the 4 and that’s ALL SHE WROTE fro Frye

  28. January 4th, 2008 at 11:24 am

    QQ says:

    Best back-up? I thought Damon Jones was the best back up in the nba?

  29. January 4th, 2008 at 11:44 am

    hatinonmanu says:

    Ian,

    Manu had nothing to do with the Spurs losing. Manu is a role player, and if he was in the game playing his role, the result would have been the same, but it would have taken longer because Manu would have stopped the play at least 5 times with his stupid flopping. It’s probably better than he is out…who replaced his minutes? Michael Finley, who is better than Manu is, even though he’s like 45 years old.

    Manu really needs to toughen up, the guy stubbed his finger and has been out for almost a month, if it were a high school or college team, he would have been booted for being such a puss.

  30. January 4th, 2008 at 11:56 am

    Ian says:

    well hatin
    thats your opinion on manu but finley is nowhere as good as manu anymore and the result would be the same comon please???? spurs have the best bench in the league and manu is the reason why. everyone knows manu is a starter everywhere but since hes a team first guy he comes off the bench and still does his thing.
    so the spurs without manu still have 3 rings ??
    i think manu is their second best player
    but anyways it was just an answer to the spurs are dead comment

    isotope
    ehhhhhhh no lol
    u know i think tmac sucks (for the same reasons people talk bad about yao but i rather start a team with yao than tmac) and u r taking the spurs do it all guy and prob their best shooter on that trade.

    try getting melo hehehe

  31. January 4th, 2008 at 12:09 pm

    isotope says:

    yeah yeah yeah. TMac sucks. But i’m sure you remember his 13 points in 35 seconds to beat your beloved spurs. He still has that in him. Somewhere deep DEEP in him.

    And for those hating on Yao for not being able to single-handedly win. Remember KG, Ray Allen, and Paul Pierce were never able to do it by themselves. Even Shaq was never able to do it by himself. Its even harder to do it as a post player because of double and triple teams.

    Manu is a baller, y’all need to stop hating.

  32. January 4th, 2008 at 12:10 pm

    hatinonmanu says:

    I’d take Tmac over Manu. Tmac at least has serious injuries take him out. Manu has a hangnail and misses a few months…

    Also, if the Spurs have lets say…Nooci, they still have 3 rings.

  33. January 4th, 2008 at 12:17 pm

    isotope says:

    in case you forgot

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfurCV1FDpM

  34. January 4th, 2008 at 12:23 pm

    sonicsaint says:

    Melo is not and should not be an all-star… we are seeing that he’s a pure scorer and has few other elements to his game.. There’s no doubt that the Nuggets are AI’s team and it’s only a matter of time before Melo becomes unhappy

  35. January 4th, 2008 at 12:27 pm

    sonicsaint says:

    Oh and Richard Jefferson has nearly identical stats (25ppg, 5 reb, 3 assists) yet he’s hard-pressed to be even considered for the All-star game while Melo will most likely start… meh

  36. January 4th, 2008 at 12:55 pm

    fallacy says:

    I’d rather have someone contest a shot and get dunked on/posterized than just let them score outright. Everybody collectively ejaculated when Davis slammed over Kirilenko in the playoffs last year, but Andrei just shrugged his shoulders and said he contests every shot, no matter what, and that it wasn’t the first or last time he’d been posterized. I’d rather have someone try and fail than to just shrug and give up 2. I want to make love to Andrei Kirilenko

  37. January 4th, 2008 at 1:09 pm

    dagwaller says:

    Good call, fallacy.

  38. January 4th, 2008 at 2:22 pm

    SOUSS says:

    @ Austin Burton

    Shawn Kemp is up there with the best entertainer but nowhere near Vince. How many huge plays does he have? and dont get me started on Hot Sizzle’s status as a real bball player… More of a Circus Freak really

  39. January 4th, 2008 at 2:36 pm

    SOUSS says:

    And another random thought to the DimeCrew and Dimers

    Why don’t you guys at dime launch a sort of ChatRoom/Forum for live games. Its always interesting to be able to comment live on teams/players performance, big plays, calls, announcers nonsense…I don’t know if it already exists anywhere else on the web but it would sure be interesting and fun to be able to do so on Dime… Being in Europe and with not that many friends watching games at 3am, I always find myself looking for a place to share my thoughts,awe, disappointments…

  40. January 4th, 2008 at 2:39 pm

    Ian says:

    souss i think vince is the best but kemp is right there.

    hatin please nocioni for manu and the spurs still win (05 vs detroit)we know how much u love manu so it doesnt matter. u hate manu but look at the way even rockets fan talk about tmac and manu.

    fallacy u r right there are many scrubs in the league that give free layups and dunks just so they dont in a poster. more than half of the buckets kirenko contest arent going in.

    isotope
    yeah i remember going to bed like with 1 mn left in the game and the next morning checking the standings im like what the fuck……

    but at least it was a regular season (still hurt a bit) win for tmac not a playoff series (he will never win one well maybe if he came of the bench for the spurs… sorry couldnt help myself)

    u r right about yao
    there are garnett pierce tmac allen lovers here that hate yao cuz he cant win but neither do the ones u mentioned. and on top of that say players like nash and dirk and manu are dirt when those three always play deep into the playoffs.

  41. January 4th, 2008 at 2:40 pm

    BC says:

    Vince as an entertainer??? I didn’t realize that crying for your mom counted as “entertainment”. Please choose someone who comes to play for more than 5 minutes a game. You might as well say that the mascots are the most entertaining — they go hard for 5-10 minutes a night just like VC.

    MJ (Bulls era not Wizards) was by far the most entertaining player… he played 40 minutes every night and always made the highlights. LeBron is probably the closest thing in the NBA these days. Barkley was also super-entertaining in his prime. Kemp was definitely up there: the GP to Kemp alley-oops were amazing.

    These days,

  42. January 4th, 2008 at 2:54 pm

    isotope says:

    Jason Williams (early sacto days) was pretty entertaining. So was Steve Francis as a rocket.

  43. January 4th, 2008 at 3:04 pm

    SOUSS says:

    Don’t wont to troll over and over on this but seriously BC take a lot a this (specially the middle of the video) http://youtube.com/watch?v=3zIULG3IbiE and then search for “whatever-player-including-MJ mix” on Youtube and see how it compares.
    I’m not speaking of game skills (Vince certainly is by far below a few others). Its True that great players/teams are entertaining to watch (I even Love European Basketball, the Spurs, stockton like point-guards). But I’m talking of what the f*** did he just do here plays. Vince has a looooott of them, Lebron and the others not that much… What’s with Lebron really: Statue of Liberty on Duncan.. please…Think of Vince blowing by Mullin and throwing that vicious dumble pump reverse in traffic

  44. January 4th, 2008 at 3:40 pm

    BC says:

    SOUSS - there is no doubt that Vince has the best dunk reel of any player ever, but the other 47 minutes of each game where he takes jumpers, whines to the officials about foul calls, and rolls around on the floor with injuries take away from the overall entertainment value.

    My memories of VC playing basketball are as much about his injuries and whining as his dunks…

    So:
    Vince best dunker ever? Yes.
    Vince most entertaining player ever? No.
    VInce most wasted potential ever? Probably.

  45. January 4th, 2008 at 4:18 pm

    doc says:

    I’m not a big Manu fan but hatin you just getting silly with it everyday you like dime with Nash Dirk and Yao. And give me somebody that contests shots on my team over a bitch who’s just gonna let somebody put it in anyday.

  46. January 4th, 2008 at 8:17 pm

    IGP says:

    no one will believe this unless they check but Mike Dunleavy has 15 and 10 at halftime…

  47. January 4th, 2008 at 10:03 pm

    Ian says:

    and he finished like with 20 and 12

  48. January 5th, 2008 at 12:25 am

    Ian says:

    http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/news?slug=ks-perfect010208&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

  49. January 5th, 2008 at 12:56 am

    94by50 says:

    I laughed at that sewing circle blast… Digusted that my Bulls couldn’t seal the deal last night… At least Arizona beat Oregon State… BC, Derrick Coleman is pissed that you said Vince Carter is probably the biggest waste of potential ever… Kenny Anderson’s not too happy, either… I’m with fallacy on the issue of contesting shots (not so much on getting with AK47)… If you’re going to play defense, actually play defense. (And for the record, taking charges doesn’t count as “good defense”. I mean, the way the charge rule is currently interpreted)… Between Damon Stoudamire falling off and Channing Frye being lazy, not a good time for U of A products. At least Agent Zero’s still around (wait, scratch that). There’s still hope; maybe Richard Jefferson will make the ASG this year…

  50. January 5th, 2008 at 4:27 am

    Austin Burton says:

    @SOUSS,

    I was joking about Hot Sauce, but I will give him two things:

    (1) I haven’t seen too many NBA players get little kids to react in the ways I’ve seen Hot Sauce get kids to react.

    (2) When AND 1 last played at MSG (summer ‘06), everyone in the building stood up every time Hot Sauce touched the ball. There was an undeniable buzz about him. The only other time I’ve seen that — the MSG crowd standing up every time someone got the ball — was when Jamal Crawford was in the middle of dropping 52 on D-Wade.

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