The Worst
The WorstMy head hurts. The NBA All-Star Celebrity Game is underway, and my only regret for deciding to skip out of being there in person is that I can’t hurl a full water bottle at Michael Rapaport. Seriously, the next time my fiancee asks me exactly what a “d-bag” is, I’m going to show her a tape of this game and of Rapaport’s antics. Or at least I would, but I generally try to avoid having this dude on my TV screen at all costs.
I don’t know what’s worse: The pretend-badass act, the fact that he’s spilling out of his uni, the fact that he clearly STINKS as a player, or the grim reality that everyone is buying this and Rapaport is getting exactly what he wants; attention. All game long, the announcers have been talking about Rapaport more than anyone else, an amazing feat considering the game is on ESPN and Terrell Owens is on the court.
But it’s not just “the star of Higher Learning” (according to Mark Jones) who’s getting on my nerves. Everything about this game is pretty awful, with the lone exception being Thunder Dan‘s three-point stroke. Chris Tucker looks like Bruce Bruce trying to play, Rick Fox is woefully out of shape and molesting WNBA players, Dominique and Clyde are happily giving about 25% effort, and Wildcat Edgerson of the Harlem Globetrotters is shockingly awful. I remember ‘Edge wasn’t the greatest ballplayer at the U of Arizona, but he’s clearly gotten way worse over the years. He can’t even catch the ball.
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February 13th, 2009 at 8:28 pm
Frank says:
Wow…
February 13th, 2009 at 8:53 pm
GEE...I, i, I! says:
Yea this is pretty bad lol! They should cancel this and replace it with And 1 mixed with players who ain’t All-Stars. That would be much better and let Duke Tango on the court and Dickie V announcing. Nothing but screaming and throw Sam Jackson in there somewhere.
It would be waaaaay better than this!
February 13th, 2009 at 9:00 pm
quest??? says:
Damn I wanted to see it but I can’t cuz Im working. Who are the players and which one is playing the best?
February 13th, 2009 at 9:02 pm
hot bitch says:
I would love to fuck Michael Rappaport. And Brian Scalabrine.
February 13th, 2009 at 9:04 pm
Prof. TX says:
If they ever do a 2man pro-am event like golf does, Rapaport and Scalabrine have to team up. They seem like pretty much the same guy to me.
February 13th, 2009 at 9:13 pm
quest??? says:
what is that guy doing??????? Damnn I wanna see
February 13th, 2009 at 9:20 pm
fallinup says:
The only thing that Rapaport is known for these days is sucking it up in celebrity bball games…hilarious. Who would eat 5 whoppers faster, Rapaport or Chris Tucker?
February 13th, 2009 at 10:11 pm
control says:
This half time show for the rook/soph game is worse than the entire celeb game…They couldn’t even get that no name guy some chicks who are in shape to dance near him? Those chicks look like porkchops and last weeks roast beef.
btw, Michael “Beasy” is just straight jacking, guy really isn’t that good, nor does it look like he gives a fuck at all.
February 13th, 2009 at 10:17 pm
the cynic says:
Nique got rejected by the rim in this game
February 13th, 2009 at 10:19 pm
GEE...I, i, I! says:
control I agree. My wife and I are sitting here crackin up at how horrible dude is.
Told cats Matrix was a system dude. Webber even said it. I rest my case.
Rudy so shouldn’t be in the dunk contest.
Gotta love the way Kenny Smith is getting at Bron about the dunk contest and his triple …points, rebounds and assist in NY
February 13th, 2009 at 10:22 pm
GEE...I, i, I! says:
Just need Chuck there to really tell them cats what it is. He probably somewhere gettin that Georgia Dome!
February 13th, 2009 at 11:13 pm
thomasmmm says:
missed the game. what did Michael Rapaport do?
Dwight should dunk three balls. Similar to Dee Brown’s dunk from before – ball on the backrim PLUS another ball on a double-sided-taped mini-hoop (the one he used for the windmill with Jameer). Left side takeoff. Right hand jam. left hand cups 2nd ball from back rim. Jam. Right had grabs third ball from other side. Jam.
YOU WIN! YOU WIN YOUNG FELLA! YOU WIN! – irritating!
February 13th, 2009 at 11:59 pm
Kudabeen says:
The celeb game was lame…They had two many professional and semi pro ball players to be that bad…They should focus on the none athlete celebs that are actually in shape and touch basketballs more than once a year…Horrible.
How old is Nancy Lieberman? She has to be 50 and she was looking more athletic than most…
Nique looked old…
Rappaport was horrendous…
I always enjoy seeing lisa Leslie on the court, because she should be an example…You don’t have to be a dyke to ball hard…(Yeah I’m looking at you…70% of the WNBA). When watching women’s BBall I want to see women not BoyGirls…
Globe trotters being tossed in wasn’t that hot either…
Where was Brian McKnight, Jamie Foxx, Ice Cube, Bow Wow?
Game could have been much better…
February 14th, 2009 at 12:01 am
Murdog says:
Dear Michael Rappaport,
Due to your “play,” the game of basketball may have taken a step back tonight.
You had like 8 fouls, 6 or 7 in the first half! Despicable…
Please stick to your D-list acting career.
~Signed, Everyone
February 14th, 2009 at 12:17 am
dk says:
MR was the only reason to watch the shit for a game…
February 14th, 2009 at 1:53 am
TomGfromCanada says:
yous trippin, this was the best celeb game i have ever seen.
February 14th, 2009 at 7:37 am
J 694 says:
Didn’t see the game, but I always liked Rappaport. It’s a shame he played like shit and looked like a d bag.
I agree with Gee. It would be fun to see an street ball style game with some NBA guys (replace the nylon w/ chain nets). This may be the only time Marbury or Tinsley see some run in the US.
Not sure what the starting fives would be. Anyone have any ideas?
February 14th, 2009 at 8:29 am
Ross says:
You mean someone actually watched this game?
February 14th, 2009 at 9:45 am
Mike says:
Who is Michael Rappaport? I’m dead serious.
February 14th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
infinite dip says:
@Kudabeen
if u are truly yearning for the days when bow wow and brian mcknight played in a celeb bball game u are totally delusional
February 14th, 2009 at 3:01 pm
Austin Burton says:
They need to make the Celeb game like Rock-n-Jock; 30-point shots, etc.
February 14th, 2009 at 3:58 pm
Byrd says:
LOL yeah it was pretty bad, the worst though was Faison, Jones and Barry kept saying his shooting stats were like 5-36 over the last few celebrity games. I think I would rather see a 3rd and 4th year player game than this, or something, although handles was breaking people off..
February 14th, 2009 at 4:38 pm
smokez4Dayz says:
Future Stars vs AND 1 or something.
but dont diss on Rappaport, he’s a brooklyn guy…geesh!