Smack / Aug 16, 2009 / 1:27 am

Agent Zero, playground hero

Gilbert Arenas

Gilbert Arenas

Back during his peak, one of the things we loved about Gilbert Arenas was that he’d randomly show up at D.C.’s famous Barry Farms court to play in the Goodman League, putting in work against the D.C./Maryland area’s best playground ballplayers with the same attitude that he’d go at Deron Williams or D-Wade on an NBA court. But then the injuries started to pile up, and even when he was healthy here and there, Gilbert understandably wasn’t as much of a presence on any concrete court while Kevin Durant took over the mantle as the NBA’s Barry Farms regular. On his way back from this latest injury, though, Arenas has not only looked like his old self indoors, he’s also back on the playground. According to the Washington Post, in a Goodman League game from this past Friday, Arenas dropped 35 points and seven dimes and dunked “effortlessly.” Confirming what Flip Saunders has said on record, Arenas didn’t look like somebody getting over a knee injury … So if we can go out on a limb and say Arenas will be 100% healthy this season, how do you think he’ll do? In his prime he was dropping 28-30 points a night, but in his brief stint with the Wizards late last season, looked like he might be trying to be more of a playmaker/passer. Is 22 points and seven assists a night a modest goal for Arenas in ’09-10? Should we go higher than that? … The last thing Orlando wants is for Marcin Gortat to get injured before he even has a chance to not live up to his contract. The Polish McIlvaine suffered a back strain while playing for his national team the other day, but so far it’s being called a minor injury. Nic Batum also hurt his shoulder playing for Team France recently. You can tell which organizations have money to burn in these cases: The Lakers sent a doctor to Spain to check on Pau Gasol when he got hurt, but the Blazers are asking Batum to fly back to Portland to evaluate the injury … Signs of the recession hitting the NBA: A jeweler in L.A. is suing O.J. Mayo, claiming O.J. never paid for $150,000 worth of product he had made a little before last summer’s draft. According to the lawsuit, O.J. ordered the first batch of jewels on April 1, 2008, about a week after his freshman season ended at USC and before he declared for the NBA Draft … The Cavs keep making small moves to get slightly better. After bringing in Jamario Moon, Anthony Parker and Leon Powe, yesterday they signed Rob Kurz, who stuck around with the Warriors last season as a solid outside-shooting big man. Seeing the way the rest of the Cavs played as the postseason went on, anybody who can put the ball in the hole is worth at least consideration for the roster. Kurz probably won’t play much, but he’ll give Shaq somebody to stomp all over in practice … Speaking of dunking dummies, do you realize Darko might mess around and end up starting at center for the Knicks? Between Darko and Eddy Curry, does any team go two-deep with two worse players at any position? … Baron Davis to the L.A. Times: “The way I see it, we’re the worst team. We’ve got a huge mountain to climb. The only way we’re going to do that is be the team that works the hardest.” Gotta love that Clippers’ positivity. Somebody should tell Baron that they weren’t really the worst team in the League, but whatever gets you motivated, right? … E-mail from Dime’s Austin Burton: “Saw two very random jerseys while on vacation in Ocean Shores (Wash.): Broncos Jake Plummer, and a Sacramento Kings Gerald Wallace. Crash was in that one dunk contest when he played for the Kings, but I don’t remember him doing anything else.” … Remember we told you about the Lakers 3-on-3 Tournament going on in Cali this weekend? On Day 1 of the tourney yesterday, Bryon Russell was on one of the teams, and he lost early. Not a good look for an ex-NBA dude. Said Dime’s Aron Phillips: “He’s still shook since MJ stole his soul.” … We’re out like O.J.’s ice budget …

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  • that’s whats up

    this is some early shit

    but good

  • that’s whats up

    also sad that we’re talking about 26-27 year old Arenas and already referring to his peak – dude should be peaking now

  • Harris11

    Can’t wait for hibachi to be back to his old self this season

  • Luigi

    especially cant wait. it musta been a slow day at the office today. but i saw Gil @ BF. n wow he killed it. when he gets back…the league better WATCH out for the WIZ this year.

  • kowtz

    “Between Darko and Eddy Curry, does any team go two-deep with two worse players at any position? ”

    I believe it was not long ago when Darko and Kwame played for Memphis… ;)

  • http://n/a Heaven is a Playground

    I can’t wait for Agent Zero to get back out on the court and starting dropping bombs on his foes. It might be a bit tough for him because of all the young guards that came into the league and starting making solid names for themselves. I still hope Gilbret the best.

    Cavs are turning out to look like a solid team on paper. I think they will mesh very well there with LBJ being that type of teammate willing to share the ball. Parker can hit some shots, and he plays well against other two guards, not the best, but solid enough to help LBJ on the offense and defensive wing. Moon well, he is athletic, but sometimes it looks like he quits. If Powe stays injury free, he should be able to help out alot.

    Clipper are lottery bound. Baron is going to retire with shit load of money, but shit load of loses.

  • Flying_Aussie_Dutchman

    I can’t be bothered looking it up, but how many more years on Baron’s contract?

  • sh!tfaced

    Byron Russell will forever be known as MJ’s bitch…

  • Josh Tha roc

    Agent 0 lost me when he was bullshittin on his blog about 100% healthy and I believed him and picked him number 1 in my fantasy draft. Needless to say he lied.

  • AB_40

    Between Darko and Eddy Curry, does any team go two-deep with two worse players at any position?

    yup jerome james and aaron gray in chicago these are both over weight have hands of stone and make more money then all of us.

  • K Dizzle

    at least both those dudes have size. Whoever the Rockets rollin out at the 2 guard spot since TMac and Wafer ain’t available gotta be the worst…

  • q

    Not Byron, but Bryon Russel, Dime, likely a misprint.

  • “Big Hook” Nunez

    Two worse at the center position would be Kwame Brown and an aging Ben Wallace in Detroit. Those two should take steroids for their hand.

  • timmy D

    Darko isnt as bad as people make him out to be. He can defend really well in the post, Id take him over a lot of the slaw ass centers in the league right now

  • Da_Griff

    Darko can run. That automatically makes him the starter for the Nix.

    And Philly at the point. Louis Williams and NO ONE. They don’t even go ONE deep.

  • Dagomar

    Man, I hope Hibachi is back. I hate the Wiz as a team but Arenas was always one of my favourite players. I’ll never forget that game he went up against Kobe in Kobe’s house and got the W with, what, 62 points? Here’s hoping he’s really back at 100%. Everybody seems to be saying it, although even if Arenas is back physically he’ll probably need some games to get used to NBA competition again. If he really is back I can see him getting 25 ppg . . . .

  • jzsmoove

    Agent Zero’s agent has got to be the best agent ever. Slight nod over Allan Houston’s. Gil will end up being the worst 100M man in the near future. He is nice and all but just wont live up to that contract.

  • Brown

    Bryon Russell should just change his name to Byron. This is what happens when parents try to come up with a new way to spell an old name.

    Dwyane (Dwayne) Wade
    Stephen (Stefan) Curry

    I’m sure there’s more, just can’t think of them right now.


    The Chinese just got their asses kicked by Haddadi (19 pts, 17 ribs) and Iran in the FIBA Asia Championship game, 70-52. China never had a chance, trailing double digits for most of the game. Yi had 11 & 11 and Wang Z went for 24 & 8.

  • gyp

    150k on bling? thats just plain stupid. bet mayo will be broke at 40

  • fLaVa

    OJ played an April Fools joke on the LA Jewller… i guess he took it TOO SERIOUSLY… lol

  • http://FoxSports Jason B

    First, it’s a good story. Second, and a Sacramento Kings Gerald Wallace?????????? Gerald Wallace is on the Bobcats still right?

  • tp


    you really dont get it do you =/

  • AA

    guess the b in jason b isnt for bright

  • sh!tfaced

    GTFOH! I’d bet my left nut that the ‘B’ in Jason B doesn’t mean Brilliant, Bright or Brains. LOL. Nice link though…

  • p-dizzle

    That’s my boy Haddadi!!! Put it down!

  • Bron42 aka Had Springs before Slamball

    @jason, lol wallace was drafted by the kings and then went to the bobcats in the expansion draft. On the kings he was part of their exciting young guys core who never got burn (with a yung hedo as his sidekick)he sucked in the dunk contest but if you youtube “wallace dunks on bostan nochbar” you see he had some flashes.

    @Dime, Didn’t Agent Zeros team lose though.

    @People sayin darko is good….LMAO..the same 7’0 darko who broke his hand missing a dunk in garbage time right under the rim?…ya he was a stud on the pistons…no wait..I meant astud on themagic…umm wait..no no he was a stud on the grizlies…he just needs umm..minutes? maybe if during his predraft workouts he ad gone against people instead of chairs like yi did, He’d actully be decent by now.

    Wasn’t russel supposedly tryin to make a nba comebac too? o well so much for that

  • Sweet English

    The next person who says

    ‘It must have been a slow day at the Dime Office’

    I will personally pull your skeleton out and shit down your throat.

    It’s the fucking off season. No one is playing basketball. Of course its slow you faggot.

  • http://uoregon.edu sans

    Worse than Darko and eddy Curry? Ben Wallace and Kwame and Amir Johnson, the garbage three.

  • http://uoregon.edu sans

    Actually, now that I think of it, “garbage in triplicate” is a way better nickname for the Pistons frontcourt.

  • dk

    To the morons out there that never listen….

    Dwyane Wade said in a recent interview, regarding his eventual free agency, “The plan has always been to stay with the Heat, and that’s still the plan.”
    The Heat can offer Wade about $30 million more than any other team, and he also said, “I want to be one of those players that stays with one franchise for his entire career.” This is sweet music to the Heat organization and its fans, though obviously anything can happen once the 2010 free agent bonanza gets underway.
    Source: South Florida Sun-Sentinel

  • Guitar Hero

    Darko is actually a good post player.

    he’s tall, athletic, a good defender/shotblocker, an above average shooter (for a center) and he’s got some post moves, too.

    OK, he makes Ron Artest seem wise beyond his years, but the guy has some skills.

  • tp


    looks like you dont get it either… two words, clearance rack.

    what? still dont understand? a gerald wallace jersey and a jake plummer jersey. in washington. the jerseys from their former teams. clearance. rack.

  • Serge

    Does Jamario moon really have the highest vertical of all players in the league?


  • sh!tfaced

    LOL@Pistons’ frontline nick. the garbage three, “garbage in triplicate”, and also known as:
    Ben Wallace (The Has Been), Amir Johnson (The Never Was), and Kwame Brown (The Has Been That Never Was).

  • eyeused2b

    I don’t really care about Amir Johnson, but fair is fair. If you’re going to trash someone, at least make sure they should be receiving the criticism. Johnson can’t be a part of the Pistons’ “garbage in triplicate” b/c he’s a Buck.

  • S-SiN

    Gil the Real! Let’s hope he’s 100%

  • K Dizzle

    @ tp


    How you know the jerseys weren’t bought when said players were still on their original teams therefore not makin em clearance.rack.

  • Tha Boddy “Agent Zero Returns”

    I knew it!!!

  • Bing

    jzsmoove, you may be right about Gil ending up being the worst 100M man in the near future.

    But it could have been worse, did he not take less money so that the team could throw money at Jamison?

  • karizmatic

    If Arenas is 100% I think 25 pts 5 assts is probably his numbers. I would hope it would be more like 22 and 7 though just because that would mean he is really thinking more about setting up his teammates than shooting, but I can’t see that. I think he comes back trying to light the league up and show that he’s still the man.

  • http://dime fan

    Gilbert Arenas is a star and a great ambassador to the league. He’s a different and wierd for seemingly which is what makes him stand out. He’s like Kanye West to me of music. Misunderstood and by the time you do it’s to late. He’s arguably one of the best second round pick talents ever. He’s an all-star an olympic player and you can’t name 5 guards who have a higher skill set or have done what he’s done in the league. He’s humble intelligent and confident which translates well to his game. He gave the best player of our gen and arguably one of the greatest players in the game hell and won the game. He almost got by the third of my generation of greatness w/o cheating. He made his career of going head to head. His stats are amazing for someone who didn’t even play the 1 or 2 in college. He made the transition easy. He isn’t selfish and has always won where he’s been. If he’s healthy the Wizards could beat any team in the league on any given night. He scores and has just as high an IQ as Kobe. Could you imagine him playing the Flip Murray role for a conteding team. Put him on the Blazers they would come out of the West. He does pass. Ask Caron,L.Hughes,A.Jamison how it feels to play w/ him. He made L.Hughes an All-Star. Funny how terrible they were w/o him healthy. My favorite player in the league next to D.Wade. He actually doesn’t play for the money like the other 90% of the league. Commisioner,GM’s,Coaches alike. If you don’t love the game leave it alone.

  • http://dime fan

    Who cares about stats. So long as they win and he’s healthy he’s worth his 100 million on entertainment value alone. He makes you watch the Wizards play and also miss when he isn’t blogging.