The Best Playground Nicknames
Over on HighSchoolHoop today, there’s a good story about the stars of tomorrow night’s Elite 24 game at Rucker Park and their quest to earn quality playground nicknames at the Mecca of streetball.
It got us talking here in the office about our favorite playground nicknames that we’ve heard over the years. Everything came up, from “Bone Collector” and Kobe‘s “Lord of the Rings” Rucker moniker to ones that have made us laugh out loud, like Kenny Brunner calling himself “Bad Santa” and Daniel Artest being referred to as “The Sibling” up at 155th for years.
What are the best playground nicknames you’ve heard over the years? We’ll give special shout outs to the best ones in Smack tomorrow.
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August 20th, 2009 at 1:39 pm
ant says:
stephon marbury.
August 20th, 2009 at 1:46 pm
Chicagorilla says:
The Air up There is a very creative nickname. Fits him perfectly
August 20th, 2009 at 1:58 pm
@ says:
Not exactly a playground nickname, but I’ve always been a fan of Maggette’s “bad porn”.
August 20th, 2009 at 2:04 pm
sh!tfaced says:
A.C. Green – The 40-year-old virgin.
August 20th, 2009 at 2:07 pm
dh says:
“the bus driver”
apparently cuz he’ll take you to school.
“lord of the rings” is hilarious!
August 20th, 2009 at 2:10 pm
T.J. says:
Doo Be Doo
Hot Sauce
Skip To My Lou
those are sum of my favs
August 20th, 2009 at 2:19 pm
sh!tfaced says:
Ed “Booger” Smith, if it’s strictly playground nicks.
August 20th, 2009 at 2:22 pm
Flint says:
Kemba “EZ Pass” Wallker
Lance Stephenson “Yo yo” (for his handle)
Corey Williams “homicide”, “Silver Surfer”
August 20th, 2009 at 2:30 pm
pinoyboy7 says:
my nickname was given to me in HS – “Philipine Airlines”
August 20th, 2009 at 2:33 pm
EN FUEGO says:
CHUBBY COX, 8th round pick by the Bulls in 1978. Played seven games for the Washington Bullets in the ’82-’83 season. And he’s also Kobe’s uncle.
August 20th, 2009 at 2:38 pm
BRUCE says:
The Future
August 20th, 2009 at 3:20 pm
shake&bake says:
Main Event
August 20th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
art says:
back in the days, on venice beach was called
“butterman”
“africa”
August 20th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
That's Whats Up says:
I played with a dude who called himself Deuteronomy
August 20th, 2009 at 3:54 pm
Tig obamo says:
Brenty Bucketz, the great one, mr anticipated, outlaw
August 20th, 2009 at 4:08 pm
POPPI GEE says:
@ That’s Whats UP
LOLLLLLLLL NOW that is hilarious. I am just trying to picture hearing that. “I’m Deuteronomy pimpin, get ya game up!”
I just like when 1 player has several nicknames and he is on camera like:
Yea what up it’s ya boi “One-eyed Sleuth” aka “Steel Scrotum” aka ” Mr. Scoring in 3 seconds or less” aka “Hittin the game-winner while lookin at ya girl”. Holla at cha boi YEA!
Deuteronomy …that is just classic. Why was he calling himself that?
August 20th, 2009 at 4:09 pm
JAmes says:
Bob Garcia calling Michael Beasley Mike “Be Easy” Beasley and Be Easy Mike Beasley at the first Elite 24 and calling Kyle Singler “Shampoo” b/c of his hair- “Shampoo for 2″ and last but not least- Brandon Jennings- “Doo be doo”
August 20th, 2009 at 4:16 pm
JayChau says:
Best nickname – 2 Hard 2 Guard
August 20th, 2009 at 4:20 pm
LB says:
Earl the Pearl aka Black Jesus- Rhymes with his name, describes his game.
August 20th, 2009 at 4:20 pm
LB says:
World B. Free
August 20th, 2009 at 4:26 pm
abpin says:
we used to call a dude “chicken run” because he always ran like a chicken. not run-away, but the way he looked wen he ran. classic.
“dead president” coz boy was money
August 20th, 2009 at 4:46 pm
EN FUEGO says:
When former Portland Trailblazer Billy Ray Bates played in the Philippine Basketball Association, they called him “THE BLACK SUPERMAN”.
The man was awesome and put up insane stats. His dominance there was like MJ and Dr. J put together. In four seasons, he averaged 46.2 points a game, 11+ boards, about 8 assists and shot an astonishing 64.5 percent from the field. He was so good, he was “held” to a career low of 28 points.
August 20th, 2009 at 5:02 pm
Brown says:
My boys used to call me “Layups” when we were younger. My outside shot was inconsistent, I didn’t have the hops to dunk (still don’t), but I had the size and strength to get to the hole at will. Layups all day.
August 20th, 2009 at 5:15 pm
sh!tfaced says:
Used to play with some guy they called Nixau, because he looked like the dude from The Gods Must Be Crazy movies. The man was so damn dark and the fool always smiled and didn’t have a clue most of the time. And he was Asian of Chinese & Filipino decent and had kinky hair, so we had no idea why the fuck he looked like that.
August 20th, 2009 at 6:05 pm
utahJZZ says:
My buddy Larry “The Rubber Band Man” Young
August 20th, 2009 at 6:15 pm
control says:
Bad Porn is hilarious, even more funny because the explanation behind it is DEAD on.
One guy I knew was called “DSL” for “Dick Sucking Lips” because he got dunked on so much that he ended up sucking more dick than an hooker.
August 20th, 2009 at 6:44 pm
dimemag follower says:
deaf jam
(guy that hooped with us that wore a hearing aid)
August 20th, 2009 at 7:03 pm
mike sydloski says:
my boys nicknamed me ” the sickness ” for two reasons:
1, my range is so off the chart, when i would stick a 35(thirty five) footer off the dribble in a game, johnny b would say” thats sick” over and over and:
2, i hurt myself so many times, it was obviously a sickness that i kept on playing.
August 20th, 2009 at 7:35 pm
quest??? says:
I used to play with a dude called nighttrain…by now u should now why….
August 20th, 2009 at 7:36 pm
quest??? says:
every time he scored he yelled chuuu chuuu
August 20th, 2009 at 7:38 pm
K Dizzle says:
lmao @ “Yea what up it’s ya boi “One-eyed Sleuth” aka “Steel Scrotum” aka ” Mr. Scoring in 3 seconds or less” aka “Hittin the game-winner while lookin at ya girl”. Holla at cha boi YEA!”
classic…
August 20th, 2009 at 7:53 pm
JuiceMode says:
Hair Force One, because he had a Kenny Powers hair-do always wore the same Nikes.
August 20th, 2009 at 8:15 pm
nosmelone says:
My boy Morgan has earned the nick name “big M, little Organ” that’s the best nickname ever!
August 20th, 2009 at 9:59 pm
NC says:
Allen “Bubba Chuck” Iverson and Club Punch Carmelo
August 20th, 2009 at 11:05 pm
Ben Jammin says:
33 wins….ahaha
August 21st, 2009 at 1:28 am
ARHE Network says:
Earv Opong (I’ll be right back)
Maalik Wyans (Lik Lik so unique) -last year’s Elite MVP
LaQuinton Ross (Bag o Ice)
Earl Monroe (Black Jesus)
Side bar: YouTube (Lamar Mundane) -playground legend
August 21st, 2009 at 1:38 am
luckylester says:
Stacy Augmon “Plastic Man” and I don’t know if that’s playground ish, but I’d bet that most guys get their nicknames from their boys, or at least from guys at the playground – so maybe?
and…
King and Duck, just has a nice ring to it that one, maybe it’s because WMCJ is one of the best flicks of all time and those cats are real (aren’t they?).
August 21st, 2009 at 2:44 am
Alex says:
My all-time favorite, Father Time. A 65-year-old white guy with a 2 foot long grey beard. He could ball tho.
August 21st, 2009 at 8:04 am
Andray says:
named my dude liquid, ’cause he always got 2 da hole, single coverage, double teams, zone…didn’t matter.
August 21st, 2009 at 8:48 am
imungloloupaw says:
HAHAHAHAHA lol at father time!
dead president nick is nasty haha
August 21st, 2009 at 9:28 am
Saku 39 says:
Greg “Postertag”
August 21st, 2009 at 11:09 am
Caesar says:
best kept secret
best kept (no longer a) secret
August 21st, 2009 at 12:01 pm
Big V says:
“Bodysnatcher” and “The Abuser”.
August 21st, 2009 at 5:40 pm
Ric Hardwood says:
Baron “2 Easy” Davis
August 22nd, 2009 at 8:11 am
doc says:
Sad Eye,Cuts,Go get em,and raw dog with no lube.
August 25th, 2009 at 1:23 pm
darren freeman says:
southern play ground legend
dwayne “o-so-sweet” darling
east coast baller
earvin ” I’ll be rght back” opong