The Gangs of NBA Fantasyland
On this, the day of my daughter's wedding...
As we anticipate the commencement of the brand spanking new 2009-10 NBA season, let’s take a look at a handful of fantasy “gangs.” To be more specific, let’s give fun names to certain groups of players who have similar attributes — for fantasy purposes, of course. Hopefully, this post will do two things: offer you some helpful glimpses into what you should expect from these players heading into the regular season, and present you with an amusing read to help you rediscover your smile (especially if you drafted Blake Griffin) and regular breathing patterns amid all the tense eagerness for tonight.
THE ALL-GLASS JOE CREW
Fragile players who are likely to frustrate you with unannounced DNPs. High risk, high reward, high stress.
PG: Baron Davis (PG – Clippers)
SG: Michael Redd (SG/SF – Bucks)
SF: Caron Butler (SG/SF – Wizards)
PF: Marcus Camby (PF/C – Clippers)
C: Nene Hilario (PF/C – Nuggets)
Bench: Greg Oden, Tyson Chandler, Emeka Okafor, Kevin Martin, Corey Maggette, Gilbert Arenas, Kenyon Martin, Blake Griffin
THE RIP VAN WINKLES
Shh … these are deep sleepers who might never wake up, but if they do they could be worth something to you. Don’t sleep on these guys just yet.
PG: Beno Udrih (PG – Kings)
SG: Marquis Daniels (SG/SF – Celtics)
SF: Terrence Williams (SG/SF/PF – Nets)
PF: Craig Smith (PF/C – Clippers)
C: David Andersen (SF/PF/C – Rockets)
Bench: Ty Lawson, Shaun Livingston, J.J. Hickson, Derrick Brown, Nazr Mohammed, DeAndre Jordan
RAPUNZEL’S PUNKS
They could be letting down a lot more than their hair. These players might have had good value in recent seasons, but don’t lean too heavily on them this year.
PG: Mike Bibby (PG – Hawks)
SG: Mike Miller (SG/SF – Wizards)
SF: Peja Stojakovic (SG/SF – Hornets)
PF: Corey Maggette (SF/PF – Warriors)
C: Zydrunas Ilgauskas (C – Cavaliers)
Bench: Ron Artest, Tyson Chandler, Richard Hamilton, Tracy McGrady, Jermaine O’Neal, Allen Iverson
SHAKESPEAREAN SCHEISTERS
They’ll bring drama to their teams, and possibly yours. Baggage and attitudes are the names of the games here. Real-life issues can also become fantasy concerns for these players.
PG: Delonte West (PG/SG – Cavaliers)
SG: J.R. Smith (SG/SF – Nuggets)
SF: Michael Beasley (SF/PF – Heat)
PF: Josh Smith (SF/PF – Hawks)
C: Eddy Curry (C – Knicks)
Bench: Darko Milicic, Kwame Brown, Allen Iverson, Ricky Davis, Zach Randolph
BUBBLE BOYS
Their stocks have risen quite high since the beginning of summer, but for some a correction might be in the cards. Be soberly optimistic in your assessments of these tempting players.
PG: Louis Williams (PG/SG – Sixers)
SG: Wilson Chandler (SG/SF – Knicks)
SF: Shawn Marion (SF/PF – Mavericks)
PF: Elton Brand (PF/C – Sixers)
C: Roy Hibbert (C – Pacers)
Bench: Al Jefferson, Yi Jianlian, Kevin Durant, Greg Oden, Gilbert Arenas, Andrea Bargnani, Anthony Randolph, Channing Frye
Throughout the season, be sure to leave your questions, comments, concerns, trade offers, roster problems and more in the comments below.
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October 27th, 2009 at 2:16 pm
40 cal bouncemag.com says:
I like this list, you was most accurate with Rapunzel’s punks!
October 27th, 2009 at 2:19 pm
KenAdams says:
No one from the Jazz on the list. Is that good or bad? I thought Boozer or AK-47 would be in there, maybe even Harpring.
October 27th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
Heckler says:
shaun livingston is still in the league?
and when did kevin martin become a glass joe kinda guy?
‘Punks’ edition should be revised. your wrong on a lot of them
October 27th, 2009 at 2:32 pm
control says:
How is Rondo not on the SHAKESPEAREAN SCHEISTERS list? Even with 3 future hall of famers, that guy is acting like a little bitch.
October 27th, 2009 at 2:38 pm
joe says:
good list, for once
October 27th, 2009 at 2:39 pm
JH says:
How worried should I be if the majority of my team is comprised of “Bubble Boys”?
October 27th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
Jah says:
I picked up Channing Frye with my final pick of my draft…
October 27th, 2009 at 4:46 pm
len-e says:
i got 7 out of 13. is that bingo?
October 27th, 2009 at 4:58 pm
The Fantasy Doctor says:
@JH: I’m not saying all the Bubble Boys will burst this year. It’s just a word of caution to don’t get too carried away in the hype, since at least some of them are probably a little overvalued right now.
@Jah: Nicely done.
October 27th, 2009 at 5:34 pm
dmitry of jersey says:
way off on durant.. the bubble will prove to be warranted
October 27th, 2009 at 5:43 pm
Jay says:
What’s Up Doc.. I want your advice regarding my roster, please give me you opinion about it. Thanks
Steve Nash
John Salmons
Danny Granger
Carl Landry
Dwight Howard
Mo Williams
Lamar Odom
Andris Biedrins
Lou Williams
Corey Brewer
Allen Iverson
J.R. Smith
Roy Hibbart
Your opinion is appreciated. Thx Doc
October 27th, 2009 at 5:48 pm
Rodney says:
@heckler
Kevin Martin’s has played more than 61 games in only 2 of his 5 seasons in the league = glass
October 27th, 2009 at 5:49 pm
Rodney says:
@heckler
Kevin Martin’s played more than 61 games in only 2 of his 5 seasons in the league = glass
October 27th, 2009 at 6:27 pm
dreams says:
YOOOOOOOOOOO doc
what you think of my squad.
Baron Davis
Jason terry
Rajon Rondo
Russell Westbrook
chris bosh
Michael Beasley
Marvin Williams
Pau Gasol
Andrea Bargnani
Jonny Flynn
Steve Blake
Kevin Love
Brad Miller
and im thinking of canning Blake for Chris Douglas-Roberts
October 27th, 2009 at 6:58 pm
The Fantasy Doctor says:
@dmitry of jersey: That list isn’t for players who WILL prove to be busts, just those whose stock has risen a LOT during the summer and preseason and could warrant some restrained hopes. I agree that Durant will prove to be well worth a No. 4-7 pick this season.
October 27th, 2009 at 7:42 pm
The Fantasy Doctor says:
@Jay: You’ve got the makings of a good team there. D-Ho and Biedrins will destroy your FT%, but if you don’t mind then that’s OK. Nash is your only true source of assists, so keep an eye on that. You look good on threes and, so long as both Howard and Biedrins are playing for you, rebounds.
It’s a shame Granger is sitting out tonight.
I think you can shore up your SF and PF spots a bit more. Otherwise, good start.
October 27th, 2009 at 7:47 pm
advocate says:
doc,
just wondering…is yao gonna be back at all this season?
October 27th, 2009 at 7:55 pm
The Fantasy Doctor says:
@dreams: Nice backcourt…almost too nice. I think you can upgrade at your SF spot by trading one of your PGs in a package. You’re solid on assists, steals. Bosh and Gasol should keep you competitive in FG% and blocks, but you should get them some help there.
Good squad.
October 27th, 2009 at 8:48 pm
The Fantasy Doctor says:
@advocate: Nope.