Smack / Jan 31, 2010 / 7:25 am

Uber Pwnage

By

In the free cable TV classic Face/Off, John Travolta the FBI agent and Nic Cage the criminal switch faces (it’s complicated and corny) and go about their good guy/bad guy business while basically being the other guy. Last night was like the NBA version of Face/Off, only instead of Travolta and Cage, it was starring Kadeem Hardison and Dolph Lundgren. Blazers/Mavs saw one guy drop 52 points and absolutely dominate down the stretch, using awkward herky-jerky moves to beat his defenders between sticking jumper after jumper. Dirk Nowitzki? Nope. It was Andre Miller … Maybe the last starting PG this side of Jason Kidd you’d expect to drop a Curtis Jackson on somebody, ‘Dre was unstoppable, putting on a Dirk mask and hitting 22-of-31 from the field with only one three-pointer. It was the League’s third 50-point effort this season, after Brandon Jennings‘ 55 against Golden State and Carmelo‘s 50 against the Knicks … As you can tell by Miller’s 31 attempts, the Blazers didn’t have Brandon Roy (hamstring). Instead, it was Miller driving the lane, scoring from mid-range, and beasting cats in the post. He was possessed in the fourth quarter, dropping 18 points including a running hook shot while swooping across the lane over Shawn Marion with 14 seconds left that ultimately forced overtime. In the extra frame, Miller hit a three, a jumper and another layup — so with under a minute to go and the game tied up, of course Portland went to Juwan Howard, who hadn’t scored all game long. Juwan knocked down a pull-up J over Dirk that proved to be the game-winner … Dirk scored 28, but compared to Miller, it seemed quiet. Nate McMillan went with the “Throw every kind of look imaginable at him” defensive strategy: Everybody from LaMarcus Aldridge to Nic Batum to Steve Blake guarded Dirk at one time or another … Speaking of ownership, the Hawks followed Friday’s win over the team they apparently own now (Boston) by running into the team that has owned them lately (Orlando). The Hawks actually had a 10-point lead in the first quarter, but the Magic made a 15-2 run to go ahead, and really started turning the screws in during the third. Dwight Howard did a favor for everybody who’s been arguing for David Lee as an All-Star over Al Horford, as Dwight hung 31 points and 19 boards while holding Al to just four points and four rebounds … Despite the win, Vince Carter continued to struggle (6 pts, 2-7 FG). Between last night and the Celtics game on Thursday, at least Orlando is showing they can beat elite teams when Vince isn’t on his game. But if he is playing well, he makes them so much more dangerous … Chris Paul (knee) sat out Hornets/Grizzlies, but Darren Collison made sure it didn’t matter. He owed his team that. When the Hornets lost to Chicago the other night, Collison was a honestly a detriment on both ends of the floor after CP got hurt in the final seconds of the fourth quarter. This time he was the star, finishing with 17 points and 18 dimes. It wasn’t exactly a Magic Johnson-type highlight reel of dimes, either: Collison would just bring the ball up, pass it to somebody — almost always the right pass — and they would score. Simple as that … In overtime, Memphis was down three with about a minute left when they missed four shots on the same possession: two threes by O.J. Mayo, a three by Sam Young and a putback by Rudy Gay. On their fifth chance, O.J. tried to split a double team when Collison picked him from behind, ran down and dunked it just before Rudy could catch up to him. That was basically the dagger with 24 seconds left … Other stat lines from Saturday: Antawn Jamison posted 21 points and 23 boards, and Mike Miller barely missed a triple-double with 25 points (seven threes), nine boards and eight dimes in Washington’s win over the Knicks; Andrew Bogut had 17 points, 15 rebounds and four blocks as Milwaukee beat the Heat; and Gerald Wallace dropped 38 points and 11 boards in Charlotte’s win at Sacramento … Georgetown/Duke was already the marquee college game of the day, and then it got kicked up a notch when President Obama and his crew showed up in the building. Obama offered some quality basketball analysis when he sat in for a few minutes with Clark Kellogg and Verne Lundquist, but we still got the vibe that Vice President Joe Biden would more likely be the one who winds up coaching a team someday … We’re out like CP …

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  • darkdefender

    Steve Nash introduced the “the old white guy at the YMCA shot” but Andre Miller has taken it to a new level.

    No hops, zero footspeed… and 52 points.

    Nice headline. Uber pwnage indeed.

  • QQ

    Just watched the Blazers game. Daaaaamn. Who would’ve thought that Andre Miller would channel Clyde Drexler, while the Blazer’s best player is out? Good to see Dre murdering one of the better teams in the West.

    And don’t you just love the Blazers? They always play hard, always compete, and always oozes class. Just a few years ago, they were the Jail Blazers, the poster guys of reckless behavior in the L. Gotta give them props.

  • QQ

    And yeah, recent wins over the Celts and Hawks made my day. That, and SVG finally giving the ball to Dwight every time down. That, and Dwight showing how he just loves to prove haters wrong.

    Go Magic!

  • FK

    Hey Dime, you REALLY need to fix the formatting for Blackberry, your grey bars on the side of the page cover half of the text in every article.

    Like reading you guys, but about to abandon ship if the formatting stays so that I can only see the right half of everything

  • Crabhands

    Have to agree with FK: Dime, fix your site so that when it gets pulled up in portable browsers it works.

    I pull it up on an Ipod Touch usually and it has this huge grey bar covering the left 1/2 of the screen. Today it has it.

    Great site though.

  • spit hot fiyah

    Dre is more Richard Pryor than Harrison, and Jerebko is Lundgren, swedish and all

  • Soopa

    It would be cool if you could have a look at your site when viewed on mobile devices Dime, its not working as intended.

    I had to look twice when i saw Miller’s 52. Im gonna watch the game later on.

    And i lost money on Hornets – Grizz. Hornets sans Paul and Posey against a red hot Grizz team on home court? Ofcourse the Hornets win lol

  • JJ

    I have never been as skeptical of a boxscore. Miller’s 52 is crazier than Kobe’s 81.

  • jimmhumm

    if the grizz had an actual veteran, (and no Z-bo does not count!)they could make better plays down the stretch. I hate to say it but I would start the Abuser over Mike Conly Jr. Jr. Dude is just better all around.

    I even get the gray bar on my home pc. Dime the new format is a little rough.

  • bsteezy3

    I still can’t believe Miller scored that many points. The boxscore kept scrolling across the screen, and I noticed that he had 41 points, but I thought the game was over. Then each time the score popped up again, he had more points. When he hit 50, I ran and interrupted my girl from watching CSI (rerun) and turned to NBA TV. 22-31?? ONly 1 3pointer?? whoaaa….I don’t think we’ll ever see him score that much again in one game.

  • srb

    Dime, I get the gray bar covering the text on my work computer, so apparently it’s not just a mobile thing. My home computer doesn’t get it. But last week when you had some sponsored background that had green in it, the bar was gone.

  • baron

    Man the SW Division has for years been the toughest, but this year it’s just SICK so far.

    Even Memphis is holdin’ it down! Who would have thought Austin’s guy Z-Bo would make that kind of impact? Looks like Marc Gasol’s offseason training in the mountains really forged him to be able to handle the rigors of the game. I really thought there may be more conflict between OJ and Rudy re: touches. Lionel Hollins is doing a fantastic job by the way.

    Spurs are moving the ball much better with Parker out, IMAGINE THAT. At this point I would heavily endorse a trade for Bosh, even though the Raps won’t take it since they have Calderon & Jack. But hey, Tony is French so he’d fit right in that international roster. I really like George “Thrill” Hill, you are gonna be seeing a lot more of this kid soon. He has apparently adopted Parker’s aptitude for relentless drives to the basket.

    And who besides Poppi Gee would have thought Houston with their band of role players would be right in the mix? It’s a good thing the Spurs handed them Scola for salary relief. Landry and Brooks are badass, too. I knew they would play better without Yao and Tracy bogging them down.

    Anyway, the Houston fans can thank Daryl Morey, Portland fans can thank Kevin Pritchard, OKC fans can thank Sam Presti, who can all basically thank the Spurs organization for getting those guys ramped up for the big show. Pop thanks Larry Brown early and often in that conversation, too.

  • baron

    Oh yeah, Dre hands down wins the “Old Guy’s Moves Decimating at the Y Game of the Year Award”.

    I remember one time Tony Delk scored 50. And you just knew it wouldn’t happen again.

  • ahan

    @BlackBerry users. When reading Dimemag just go to column view on your blackberry and the gray bar should go away.

  • Soul Brova 1

    I’m a lifelong Knick fan and will admit that David Lee is ballin’ but all this “should’ve been an All-Star” whining is at that point…enough already. Isn’t Z-Bo making his first all-star appearance? Now there’s a “Human Double-Double” and he does it with 1/4 the athleticism that Lee has and can consistently score in many more ways than just the pick and roll. The NY media wasn’t giving him praises like they’re giving Lee when he was here getting double-doubles on a nightly basis. If Lee were black he’d be another good player but because he’s a hustling white guy on the NY Knicks he’s the best thing since pants with pockets. He’s not even the best player on the team (in my opinion it’s Wilson Chandler). Anyways he didn’t make it and that’s that.
    Another problem I have with the media is they all up in a roar over Iverson being voted in by the fans as a starter, citing it should be about this years stats and not a lifetime achievement reward but they would have no problem with Stern selecting Shaq to replace a player who drops out due to injury as what they call a “lifetime achievement selection” because it’s going to be the biggest all-star weekend ever and they want the biggest personality (bufoon?) ever to be there.

  • Big Island

    All-Star, not an All-Star, every year it’s someone. David Lee’s #s are a result of a system. Nash got MVP’s in the system, and while he’s an all-star, he probably isn’t an MVP if he didn’t run that offense. David Lee is nice, hustles, works hard, but isn’t an all-star.

    Those damn herky jerky old man moves get me every single time. Kobe would score 130 on me in a 20 minute game, but Dre would probably get me for 150. I could hold Al Horford to 8. Don’t even get me started on what Nick VanExel would’ve given me.

  • Blazermark

    Just think if Dre and BRoy could both have 50+ points on the same night!! But porbably the highest Dre will ever score in his life LOL. He took up the slack for ourmissing all -star.

  • http://dime eyes

    Just want to reinerate. The Rookie BJ still has high this season. Also why doesn’t everyone score on the Warriors like that. If the Bucks make the playoffs & Brandon has the better stats. Does Tyreke still get R.O.Y. because he played college ball. That would be fixed like Lebron winning the award although Melo avg’d more & went to the playoffs in the West

    What is the KINGS record since Kmart 2 return ? They’re losing practically every game. The Bucks are playing pretty well as of late. Ilayosova promise was a fluke. Chemistry is very important to team success. The Magic totally disrupted that wth Jameer in the finals & his return this yr

    Dre miller 53 wth no jump shot is just abusive and the W

    @QQ Why would you bring up the jailblazers? Negativity & No Dre’s Vitamin Water is no where close to Kobes 80 baby or 62 in 2 periods less against a better defensive Mavs team post knee surgery.

    The 50 cent reference was cool. That’s my dude.

  • http://dime eyes

    Dre miller has a lot of high scoring outputs in the league. Research people or know ur facts. He was a scorer in college. Philly misses him. Portland shouldn’t have offered him. Turkolu picked the wrong team like D’mustache. The longer people are out. Dre is a pro’s pro. He’ll do whatever necessary to help them win. Pretty sure he’ll have a few more 30 & 40′s. He’s billups w/o the jumper. Crafty like a WIZ. Grown Man Skill & Tricks.

    Shout outs to nick the quick. Nick at Night. Where is he or up to know ?

  • Big Island
  • Bing

    Big Island is on the money re Lee. Same could be said for Andrew Bogut. He is putting up numbers, works hard but its difficult to be an all star on a loosing squad

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