Team Kobe vs. Team Dwight: The NBA All-Star Game gets a makeover
Dwight Howard, Dime #60
Considering the National Hockey League went from a legit “major” sport in the 1990s — even if you didn’t like hockey, you still had NHL 95 on Sega or Super Nintendo — to losing an entire season to a labor lockout, being relegated to Versus for a big chunk of its American national TV coverage, and getting less hype on ESPN than the X-Games, it’s safe to say the league didn’t do such a good job on the business side.
That said, pretty much everyone at Dime loved the NHL’s idea of having a player-led draft for its 2011 All-Star Game. And of course, we thought of doing it for the NBA.
So here’s the set up: The top All-Star vote-getter in each conference is a team captain. In this case, that would be Kobe Bryant and Dwight Howard. He can choose from a pool of the already-elected All-Star starters and reserves, with one alternate pick that can be anybody in the NBA except someone from his regular team.
For these proceedings, the part of Dwight Howard will be played by Austin Burton, while the role of Kobe Bryant will be played by Aron Phillips. Kobe has the rings, so he gets first pick:
*** *** ***
TEAM KOBE
“LeBron James. When you can have the last three MVP award winners on one team, life is good.”
TEAM DWIGHT
“Dwyane Wade. He can take over in crunch time as a scorer, plus he’ll know how to pass me the ball. Nobody gonna stop a pick-and-roll combo with me and D-Wade. I may be wrong, but I doubt it.”
TEAM KOBE
“Kevin Durant. The Nike Basketball triumvirate of me, ‘Bron and KD is unstoppable. Buckets. Buckets. And more buckets. This is the All-Star Game. Shoot now, play defense later.”
TEAM DWIGHT
“Carmelo Anthony. Good point, and you know ‘Melo gets buckets easier than anybody in the League. Besides, me and him might as well get used to being All-Star teammates when the format goes back to East versus West next year.”
TEAM KOBE
“Blake Griffin. This might sound crazy, but I’ve got to go with my Staples Center roommate next. Have you seen this kid play?! He’s nice. Makes me kind of glad to know that my time has almost come to an end. If we get him the touches, he could win MVP.”
TEAM DWIGHT
“Amar’e Stoudemire. I like how you still haven’t picked anybody who can guard me. (Didn’t D-Wade shut you down on Christmas Day? Just sayin’ …) Anyway, good luck checking me and STAT.”
TEAM KOBE
“Pau Gasol. You’re talking about defense, then I gotta pick my man Pau Gasol. And that’s ‘back-to-back world champion Pau Gasol’ to you. Ahem…”
TEAM DWIGHT
“Chris Paul. Doesn’t have to score to dominate.” Read More>>
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February 7th, 2011 at 10:45 am
Ben1en says:
Wasn’t one of the rules that you couldn’t select someone from your regular team? Pau Gasol is on Kobe’s team…
February 7th, 2011 at 11:07 am
yoda says:
kobe would really said shoot now, play D later? guy that takes pride in his defense? i don’t think so…
February 7th, 2011 at 11:30 am
First & Foremost says:
Must See TV…
Team Dwight built the better team.
Team Kobe 5 < Assists < 10
February 7th, 2011 at 11:31 am
Detroit Dave says:
Can I atleast get a few props for bringing up this idea on one of those last All Star Posts. (great read by the way)
February 7th, 2011 at 11:50 am
Jay14 says:
You couldn’t select someone from your regular team on the alternate pick, not already picked all-stars. But I do think Kobe’s team has the better edge.
February 7th, 2011 at 11:52 am
M-Dot Smitty says:
@Ben1en — It says the alternate pick can’t be from your own team. Basically like Kobe can’t bring D-Fish along just cuz that’s his boy.
February 7th, 2011 at 11:55 am
Ian says:
howard has a better TEAM still i rather see a US vs the world game.
February 7th, 2011 at 12:19 pm
slick ric says:
Give me any team with lebron and blake on it.
February 7th, 2011 at 12:33 pm
JR says:
US vs World… come on Stern, JUST DO IT!
February 7th, 2011 at 12:36 pm
cesar says:
kobe james durant and blake? LOL
February 7th, 2011 at 12:42 pm
LakeShow84 says:
Kobe, Lebron, Durant, Rose and Griffin and Gasol??
Thats retarded squad sorry lol
Everyone can score and stretch the floor..
A little thin on the front line tho..
February 7th, 2011 at 1:08 pm
Chicagorilla says:
Team Dwight would smash Team Kobe because team Dwight is a more complete team on the inside.
Also I think the format goes, whomever gets selected, that person gets to make the next pick.
So if Kobe’s first pick is Lebron James then the next time Team Kobe picks, Lebron is the one who makes the pick. But he cant chose one of his teammates from his regular team.
February 7th, 2011 at 1:11 pm
Chicagorilla says:
@Ian
US vs the world would be boring and a complete blowout….thats why we have the olympics anyway. Plus too many REAL allstars would be left outta the game just to make a team of the world. Guys like Luis Scola would be picked ahead of Blake Griffin or KLove.
February 7th, 2011 at 1:19 pm
Moo says:
no way kobe picks so many celtics
February 7th, 2011 at 1:47 pm
Dagger says:
Team Kobe would win, no question. Blake, Gasol, Bosh and KG? That’s a really nice, well-rounded assortment of big men. The backcourt has a great mix of crazy athleticism, length and shooting. And that Lebron/Durant tandem just can’t be beat. Meanwhile most of the team Kobe players are great two-way talents; you can’t say the same about Melo, Amare, Love and Dirk.
February 7th, 2011 at 1:52 pm
bookkwormmaster says:
Team Dwight is more offensively versatile and has more matchup problems to cause. They got size and rebounding waaay to their advantage. They can can pick and roll with ANY player on the team and be successful. Team Kobe is more perimeter oriented. They lack any decent size and toughness and could probably be worn down from the bigs of Team Dwight. However I think they got the advantage defensively as they posess more defenders especially on the perimeter. Team Dwight wins by 10 or more
February 7th, 2011 at 1:56 pm
Ian says:
For the guys pickin kobes team remember they only get one ball.
Chicago
Can’t agree it won’t be boring or a blowout. Hell 4 seasons ago a world team would beat the us team (I’m givin the world an in his prime td at the 5 not yao). Boring is what we have now and even if kobe and howard get to pick teams they won’t go all out. The us can’t blow out (hell who knows if even beat) an 04 argentina team or an 04 08 spanish team why not add em up and let them play vs the us.
Parker
Manu
Td
Yao
Nash
Dirk
Gasol
Scola
Fernandez
Galinari
Peja (I know just let me think its the 03 version)
February 7th, 2011 at 1:57 pm
hakasan says:
gotta say i like dwight’s team better… can’t see how kobe’s team will get any rebounds facing howard/love/horfod/duncan/stat…
also think dwight’s team will have less turnovers…
as much as kobe has ray allen on the 3s… dwight’s got dirk/love/pp/jj….
February 7th, 2011 at 2:54 pm
w says:
Ian it would be this year though, not 04 versions or even 08 versions of players. Yao’s basketball career is done and a few of those people you named are borderline all stars (scola, hes a great player but not better then BG or love or LMA, Galinari aint no all star yet, nash isn’t exactly in the best pg conversation anymore, fernandez was overhyped and a bitch). Oh and TD played on the US team, he’s ours now.
February 7th, 2011 at 3:06 pm
clib says:
What are the chances a Laker picks a Celtic. I’d really doubt Kobe would go there. Especially with the game at the staples center
February 7th, 2011 at 3:47 pm
ProphetGK says:
That would be an entertaining game to watch, hopefully they can implement this concept for next year’s all-star festivities. As well as improving the other aspects, such as the slam dunk competition (Wade vs LeBron vs Howard vs Durant).
February 7th, 2011 at 4:11 pm
nizzio says:
Hilarious! Kobe’s team is amazing. Should move Griffin to center and put KD at PF cuz dude doesn’t deserve to come off the bench
February 7th, 2011 at 4:30 pm
heavy d says:
Al gets picked last? I don’t think so. If I’ve got my scorers already then I’m going for Al well before Bosh if I want to win (which I do).
February 7th, 2011 at 5:00 pm
45% says:
you stole this from simmons. :-\
February 7th, 2011 at 6:18 pm
Ian says:
w
i know but still the game will be conpetitive cuz everyone would want to win.
btw ” Oh and TD played on the US team, he’s ours now.” haha comon yaos done hes the only one left that can play center.
February 8th, 2011 at 9:00 am
rainman says:
sooo…NONE of you writers picked Steve Nash? Not even over RUDY GAY, or BRANDON JENNING?!
Nash gets overlooked and snubbed once again…
February 8th, 2011 at 1:32 pm
Dwight Howard says:
@rainman:
My frontcourt partner Amar’e Stoudemire asked that I not pick Steve Nash as the alternate because he’s tired of people saying he is only good because of Nash. He wants to prove them wrong with the Knicks and at All-Star.
-Superman
February 8th, 2011 at 7:41 pm
Speak Up says:
Kobe would never choose Ray Allen lol. I love Ray but that beef between one another a while back…
February 10th, 2011 at 12:28 pm
KnicksFan says:
US vs the world would be wack. !12 black guys versus 5 good international players and 7 wack international reserves