We want to know what he was drinking. Was it Johnny? Maybe Jack. Maybe a little Hennessy. Whatever it was, it looks like it did the trick, as DeShawn Stevenson was arrested and charged with public intoxication Tuesday night in Texas. First off, you can assume that after winning the championship, the whole crewis still partying. What would you do if you just worked for a whole year towards a goal, achieved it, and then had nothing to do for the next four months (and you’re filthy rich to boot)? We’re thinking you’re hitting the club with a real deep V-neck. DeShawn’s response to the episode: “When you’re a champion, everything is under a microscope.” Or a breathalyzer. Abe is clearly on cloud nine, and we don’t blame him. However, he’s surrendered any pull to call the Heat “classless,” as Stevenson did earlier this week … The Ricky Rubio mystery continues as Minnesota’s top sleuth, GM David Kahn, continues on the case. After it was recently announced that Rubio had agreed to boat it over and play for the Wolves next year, the former wunderkind mentioned he’d be discussing his future with Barcelona after just winning an ACB Championship. Now, new reports are confirming that Rubio has finally inked his NBA rookie contract. We just don’t know what to believe these days. What we do believe are the stats, the stats that say Rubio scored a total of three points in a three-game finals series for all the marbles in the ACB, contributed in part by a big squadoosh in 10 minutes in the final game. The word out there is that he’s gained some quality size over the last few years and that his game is more equipped for the NBA game than Euroleague stylings…but we don’t know, squadoosh is squadoosh. Either way, we’re sure Kevin Love is smiling somewhere … Rick Carlisle came out giving all kinds of props to Miami coach Erik Spoelstra during the Mavericks exit interviews. Carlisle said Spoelstra had the “toughest job in basketball” this year. The dude is right. Carlisle had the job of winning as many basketball games as possible, and he did. Spoelstra had the job of winning a ring, and that’s it. With expectations that high, and with three of the top five-to-10 basketball players/primadonnas in your starting lineup, your whole season is banner or bust. We’re not sure how Spo slept at night (especially with Pat Riley creepily standing over his bed). Despite coming two wins shy of a ring with a team that just finished their first full year together, we think that Spoelstra did an incredible job. And that he’s got great hair … In more Heat news, Miami extended Mario Chalmers a qualifying offer, making him a restricted free agent this offseason. Now Miami has the ability to match any contract tendered by another team. After coming out of the 2011 Finals as one of the real winners (knocking down big shots, playing solid D, not being afraid of the moment), we’re thinking Chalmers might get some interest from any team looking for a good back-up point (ahem, New York). Let’s wait and see if owner Mickey Arison will match and continue his venture into the luxury tax. Good thing it’s not our money … How good do you think Derrick Williams can be? … In an interview with Sports Illustrated, former King Antoine Wright ripped the organization, calling them unprepared and unprofessional. He says they never had scouting reports and that DeMarcus Cousins‘ attitude was terribly out of control. Interesting … We’re out like Rubio from EspaÃ±a.
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