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Smack / Jul 21, 2011 / 12:00 am

Yao Ming Retires; Alonzo Mourning May Be In Trouble

Yao Ming

Yesterday, one door officially closed while another one opened. Yao Ming is finished, his playing days are over. Yesterday, we heard from the big man’s mouth that he is retiring. Yao will return to do some work for the team he once played for, the Shanghai Sharks, and as David Stern hopes, will probably still have some involvement with the NBA. The former Rocket thanked many former teammates and opponents, including Shaquille O’Neal, Chuck Hayes, Aaron Brooks, Kyle Lowry and Luis Scola for helping him along the way, and thanked the entire city of Houston for turning a skinny, young kid into a man. Yao might be done on the court, but he’s too big of an international presence to be lost forever. Shane Battier called him perhaps the most recognizable person in the world. He might be right. Yao will still be around in one form or another, helping to grow the game globally just as he’s always done, whether knowingly or unknowingly … We didn’t know Hot Rod would go in on LeBron like this … Teach me how to Jimmer? It looks like the best way to learn how to do that is to never shoot inside 30 feet. Fredette showed off his sniping at Jimmer Camp (appropriately named) by making three shots from beyond half court. The most annoying part about the whole tape are the YouTube reactions (as usual), calling Jimmer everything from a Don to sexy. And of course, there’s the obligatory “this looks altered” comment … Ron Artest told SI’s Sam Amick that he gets most of his jokes while in the bathroom. That would be a very Ron Artest thing to do. What he really needs to do is make some sort of wheelchair/handicapped/Andrew Bynum /injured quip because that scenario is just begging for someone to go in on Bynum … Timofey Mozgov will be going back to Russia to play where he did before coming over to the NBA. While he does have an out to return to the NBA whenever the lockout does end, will this guy be the next Frédéric Weis? … After signing with Under Armour yesterday, we caught up with Derrick Williams to talk about a number of things. Most interesting of all was that Williams believes Minnesota can be the next OKC. They have a lot of young talent, and the team’s rookie is just waiting on them to make “the jump.” But there’s a few differences between the two organizations, mainly one has Sam Presti and is pretty smart while the other has KahnDon Nelson will probably interview with Minnesota in the next few days. We suspect Anthony Randolph is already screaming at the television and ripping up the newspaper … And Alonzo Mourning is being sued over allegedly leaving the scene of an accident. Reports say Mourning’s car hit another vehicle during an accident this weekend, and supposedly ‘Zo may have left the scene. Mourning declined to say whether he was involved in the crash, saying it was already going on when he got there, so he left and then came back. Wasn’t he always known for his defense? … We’re out like Mike Wilbon vs. JaVale McGee.

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  • ScoGo

    Andrew ByDumb. Funniest part is the couple looking at him just like Phil used to when Andrew was in the wrong spot in the triangle offense.

  • sh!tfaced

    Unfortunately for Yao, his injuries were just like doors, when one closes, another one opens.

    Great player. Better person.

  • http://christianrey09.tumblr.com Christian D Rey

    yao is one of the great player in the position of center.. hope he can accept that fact.

  • BRUCE

    Hot Rod – I only know two – Hot Rod Williams, dude played on the Cavaliers and Hot Rod of the Autobots, whom later became Rodimus Prime. This Hot Rod is irrelevant.

  • Bear

    @Bruce

    Brilliant!!! My thoughts exactly

  • Bear

    @Bruce

    Amesome!! My thoughts exactly, i could understand Hot Rod Williams commenting on Lebron, hell, i thought dime was doing another “Transformers/players” thing again and said a player is hot rod, i would’ve been more entertaining ha ha

  • doc

    Yao been retiring for 2 weeks.Take your big ass home Yao.

  • First & Formizzle

    I get my material while in the bathroom too.

  • P

    lol@doc

  • JBaller

    I might have to go produce some material in the bathroom right now. Only Ron Ron would think someone wants to see the shit he comes up with in the bathroom. That’s why his jokes stink.

  • JDish

    “We’re out like Mike Wilbon vs. JaVale McGee” … ??

    I missed something right,… did I miss it on today’s dime ??

    So funny how there are some overseas players coming over as rookies, and they get here and then the lockout begins. So it’s like foreign ball players take a flight and come over to the states. They land on US soil and once they get off the plane they’re told that the NBA is “out of business” for the moment. So they grudgingly turn around and just go home. Short lived NBA experience jaja.

  • JDish

    Wouldn’t mind seeing players like Jonas Valanciunas play in one of those pro-am leagues going on right now. I mean what do foreign players do to get some adequate balling experience in the states. Get these guys playing with the ballers so they can be learning how to trash talk and “have a word” with the ref. Ah what’ev…

  • s.bucketz

    Mozgov is much better than weis…the only similarity is that they will be big ass white boys forever enshrined on youtube..

    this was the moz’s first year and for a young kid that knows zero english commin to NY wit a lot of pressure to help out i think he did a pretty good job..he had a couple decent games and 1 or 2 really good ones..

    remember…this is the guy that held up the carmelo anthony trade talks…he was the most important player in the NBA for about a 3 day period

  • Big Island

    There was Hot Rod the movie too. Hot Rod… Well since 50 signed him he’s gotta be hot! I can’t wait for hi- wait, what? What’s that? Yo mean NOBODY’S heard of the guy? That’s ok, I’ll just Google him really quickly. (type type type) Hmm, only hot rod cars. Maybe if I try Hot Rod MUSIC. (type type type) Nope, oh wait, there it is, bottom of page one, the Dime article that I didn’t read yesterday because, well, who the F is Hot Rod.

    Listen Dime, I like the site. I appreciate how you throw in the style, music, commentaries etc. into the website. If I only wanted basketball info, I would go read stat sheets. HOWEVER, you are starting to head into the “boy who cried wolf” zone. Every shirt that comes out has an article about how they’ve had the shirt game on lock for a minute. New shoes? They’ve been running the kick game. Music? I’ve had it on my ipod since 93, but he’s just now gaining mainstream love. I just don’t even pay attention anymore.

    So, Sorry Hot Rod, it’s nothing personal. I’ve just fallen for the okey doke one too many times here, and you are simply a casualty of the overhyped everything.

    You know what I would read the hell out of Dime? Go interview a few of the guys who post in here all of the time. Get Chicagorilla, First and Formizzle (who I guess went back to his maiden name?), KDizzle, maybe 5 guys, and have a sit down with them about basketball, music, style, maybe get a run in somewhere. THAT would be sweet.

  • Bear

    You can’t leave yourself out Big Island (Or your love for dirk!) Ha ha

  • Stunnaboy2K11

    Big Island going in!

  • LakeShow84

    Who wants to see me do a BIG ASS STUNT?!?!

  • LakeShow84

    Lmao @ Doc

    and i think he got 2 more weeks to go lol

  • Big Island

    Bear – I am boring as fuck, can’t play ball anymore, and wear nothing but boardshorts and tank tops. I’d host it at my house, my gf will cook the shit outta some food (bitch be bakin, one reason I can’t get below 255 lbs), have some beer by the pool etc… Except my damn dog is a racist so I can’t promise he won’t bite anyone who isn’t lighter than a graham cracker. He likes one black dude, but that guy gave him some Doritos when he was like 2 months old. He doesn’t even like my one white friend who thinks he’s black. But you guys are welcome to take your chances. My gf also works for a guy who owns a ton of bars (celebrity guy who I won’t say), so you would get VIP treatment if you wanted to go out, but your boy B.I. is in bed by like 11 so you’ll have to tell me about it the next day. You could throw whatever game into the PS3, but you’ll have to bring it over because I don’t play video games.

  • Eric
  • control

    Andrew Bynum is one of those guys who everytime I see him in the news, I hate him just a touch more. I could imagine that guy rolling around just being a douchebag to everyone he comes in contact with, almost like KG, but where KG has worked on and honed his douchebaggary skills, Bynum is just one of those ignorant naturals.

    Big Island=hilarious.

  • LakeShow84

    @ Eric

    SHOCKING!!!

    i mean with all the thievery, rape and murder going on today

    HE TAKES UP 2, TWO HANDICAP SPOTS????

    Kid is SPIRALING OUT OF CONTROL!!!!! i think hes the only person in LA with a sense of entitlement..

    I hope all that sarcasm shed a little light on how RETARDELY SCRUTINIZED pro athletes are nowadays..

    Seriously the owners of 2 top tier Sports tryna cry broke and KEEP THEIR HANDS ON MILLIONS/BILLIONS of dollars all while saying fuck the retirees and they reporting about a handicap spot??

    Dont let the media use you people..

  • http://twitter.com/#!/Quiznakes K Dizzle

    LMAO at “SHOCKING VIDEO” of AB takin up spots. Maybe he comin off rehab and got a sticker lol
    Unless a dude is actually handicapped, I don’t wanna hear from anybody able-bodied cryin about this story. You know you’d park right up front if you could.

    ……and who the heck is Hot Rod?

    and somebody need to answer that Wilbon vs McGee question

  • Bear

    @ Big Island – Sweet. Sounds like a plan. Where do i sign up?

  • Bear

    So we’ve all established that we STILL have no idea wtf is going on with Wilbon and McGee or who Hot Rod is………