Smack / Sep 9, 2011 / 12:00 am

A Birthday For Champions

Jason Terry

Jason Terry (photo. Reebok)

Jason Terry is one of the more personable guys in the whole league, and always an excellent interview. As long as he’ll be around the game, he’ll be a magnet for media. But what about his peers? Do they love him as much as we do? Apparently so. The JET is hosting a “Championship Birthday” celebration for himself next week when he turns 34. There will be entertainers and ballplayers there, mingling about for $40 ($30 if you’re a groupie). But somehow Lil’ Kim will be there, Jadakiss will be there and so will Gorilla Zoe. We thought this was a championship party? Only champs right? Where are Nas or Eminem or Jigga? We guess Kim gets the invite based off her five-mic album, which was sort of like winning a title (even though it was the worst five-mic album like, ever) … Despite 24 from Luis Scola, Argentina lost its first game of the Olympic qualifier, 73-71 to Brazil. Greivis Vasquez (24 points) was huge in Venezuela’s 110-74 blowout of Panama … The Chinese Basketball Association is set to make J.R. Smith it’s savior. Something’s not right here. We’ll be honest. We’re not sure how we feel about Smith balling out in China. They’ll either let him hoist 10 30-footers a game or bench him for every wild shot he takes. On the business side of things, it’s all murky. Will he be able to sneak out of the contract should the lockout end? How much money will he give up with the NBA? One thing for certain is that he’ll come back with some of the craziest ink anyone has ever seen. He’ll put the Birdman to shame … Who would you take in a one-on-one deathmatch of the Scotts: McKnight or the Wolf? And everyone’s favorite Jesus – Shuttlesworth – kicked off his run in the Dime Ultimate Movie Baller tournament against darkhorse Travis Porter. Forget the matchup for a second, y’all need to see Passing Glory if you haven’t. Good movie. Solid plot. And the basketball action is up there with any basketball movie … Do you agree with our list: the REAL top 10 alley-oops ever? … So David Stern and the NBA don’t care about the preseason huh? That’s what it sounds like. The NFL may need it for playbooks, getting into shape to avoid injuries and because they make a freaking lot of money from it. But for the NBA, saving the games that don’t count is a secondary thought. Not enough money involved. Too much headache. Well damn, if that’s the case, let’s just have a lockout every summer … We spent some more time with NBA 2K12 and just a day after complaining about the rookie situation, we’re back to singing praises again. My Player mode hopefully took major steps forward because as fun as the game could be at times, it got old quick and seemed to take forever. We’re all for making things realistic and hard to accomplish, but playing to the point where you finally reap the benefits took awhile. This year, they’re bringing back the player-to-coach/owner/GM interaction. Back in the day, we remember they used to have this in the Association mode, where a player would come in and you’d have to deal with them face-to-face. Now it’s the other way around and it’s fly … And if you need an uplifting story, check out this video of a 12-year-old boy who shot baskets all weekend long to support our Navy SEALS who died in a helicopter crash in Afghanistan. He’s made over 20,000 jumpers, approximately a few thousand more than Anthony Mason made his whole life … We’re out like Peyton.

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  • beiber newz

    Most of ya clowns need to step your fuckin games up
    i’m 6’4, 230 pounds go and get yall frames up
    fire in my heart, my passion lift the flames up
    five hoes in one night, but they all caught the same nut
    i make moves like a boss, you looking like a lame duck
    my hood aint sweet, you know i keep that thang tucked
    my baretta gotta temper, it wanna see your brain’s guts
    i get pussy erry night, kissing on your dame’s butt


  • Big Island

    Hell yeah on the early smack. I am all for guys playing overseas if they think there will be a lockout. Someone like JR Smith is not going to have a problem getting back into the NBA once he is done in China, so he should go for it. It’s not really any different than doing a semester abroad in college. The worst thing that happens is you go to China or Spain or Italy for a few months. If you hate it, you are out after one season. If you love it, maybe you stay. He is an NBA player, and if he has a bum season over there it won’t really hurt his NBA contract. He’s not a max dude anyway, he’ll get whatever the mid level number is when the lockout ends, which according to the Beiber Newz isn’t that far off.

    Jadakiss is the man, and Jay-Z can’t hang out with NBA guys since he owns some of the Nets. Kim and Gorilla Moe? I am gonna have to Google him. OK, so I googled it, realized it was Gorilla ZOE, and clicked on his video. Luckily it was a Vevo thing and I saw an ad for Columbiana. Zoe Saldana was the only redeeming thing in that entire window. Gotta pass.

    And the softball league started up again. We won by something like 50 runs, but the ump just stopped counting at 39. Naturally, I wore the Dirk jersey and naturally I was asked if it was brand new. I had to show the dip stains and the fact that it’s a Nike jersey and Adidas has been making the NBA jerseys for awhile. And it isn’t that swingman BS either. Bastards. So we will at least be 1-11 which is nice. The worst part? Some guy on the other team (Menace to Sobriety, great name) yelled out “Nowitzki! Why don’t you try to keep up with us drinking?!” Then another dude on HIS team says to him “Nah dude, you can’t drink with him.” I may have a bit of a problem, and I am not exactly proud of it, but I am not ashamed of it either.

  • Big Island

    Beiber, you are like 5’8″ 145 pounds soaking wet with boots on. You ain’t gotta lie to kick it.

  • beiber newz

    how the hell did you win by 51 or so? what inning did the barrage start?

    btw, that is my true size. i kno the name don’t fit but contrary to popular belief, i am NOT a beiber fan. just jacked the name for weird reasons.

  • beiber newz

    i’m so used to writing my name in that i disregard the correct spelling of bieber’s name.

  • Big Island

    If Beiber’s 6’4″, then I’m 9’6″
    And if he’s bangin 5 hoes, then I have 4 dicks
    And Baretta’s don’t have tempers, shells don’t either
    especially in the hands of a guy named Beiber
    The team that we played was as garbage as your swag
    So I gotta put you on blast in smack on Dime Mag
    It’s nothing personal, and there is no hate
    But I’m Big Island, I rep the 808
    My hood is sweet because I make it that way
    but if your hood is rough, then I guess that’s ok
    I’m not really ballin, I drive a Ram 1500
    It’s black with chrome 20’s, not really what I wanted
    But I blew out my knees, so I got rid of the bikes
    I built a big red blazer, cuz that’s what I like
    I stand 6’3″, weigh 265
    my reach is 8 feet, so I can give Beib a high five
    as far as the Blazer, it’s 8 feet too
    and I think I just proved I rap better than you


  • beiber newz
  • beiber newz

    time to spit fury like i’m ryu or ken
    you got four dicks cuz you sleeping with men
    you claim you 9’6″? well you got it all backwards
    you 69’d tim hardaway you closet fruit bastard
    acting all suspect, so just answer me please.
    be honest fatherfucker, how’d you blow out your knees?
    how dare you come at beib? your invitation to a funeral
    you aint shit but a pussy, fuck you, my middle cuticle
    my swag is fascinating pulling bitches, you masturbating
    island’s swag stay in check like a slave, with lacerations
    fuck your hood cuz my city go hard, i slaughtered you
    i called the hail mary on this play, you a martyr fool
    bx boro heavy in this bitch, 808 take a step back
    leave you hanging on that hi-5, you could just forget that
    rappin aint in his genes, his own daddy proved
    pops aint wrap the condom right, when he created you
    babies oozed, no abortion, mom aint cheat the rules
    you mistake, you fucked up and lost to beiber newz

    -undisputed champ, the beib…

  • yoda

    it is so funny when someone is trying to act tough by pulling reference to some video game dudes….

  • s.bucketz

    wtf is wit this shitty “rapping” in smack recently???u guys tryin to get signed??i mean these guys dont think jada is good so i think their ears r stuck on stupid….u might have a chance

  • Cha-Ching

    Slow news day? Nice high scoring football game last night. Green Bay’s run stoppers are freaking monsters. Aaron Rodgers got that missile lock.

  • jzsmoove

    where the fuck yall been?
    Nick the quick, half court alley to Shaq. Shaq should have just been trying to save it inbounds but smashed it instead. wasnt it like a marquee matchup against the knicks too? wwwoooo-eee.

  • ChipS

    Wow just when I thought this couldnt get any lamer, U guys just love takin shots at JR Smith, Let That Man Be, Leave that man alone half the ish aint even funny!

    Jadakiss is one of the best in the game no need to pop off at him. I’ll bet money he’ll give yall favorite rappers a run for their money if not beat him….

    SMH…. Staff are a bunch of noobs

  • jzsmoove
  • That’s What’s Up

    If I could press an END button and close the comments section I would

  • silky

    Jason Terry needs to stop talking about god

  • Big Island

    Beiber takes the belt again. Drats.

    Seriously, why doesn’t Jada get more love? I get it that he hasn’t necessarily had the same commercial success as some other guys, and a top 10 list is subjective, but shit.

    s.buckets – I would have to be on one of those MTV or VH1 shows for like a “rap rehab” or something. I don’t think the world has ever been a combination of loving rap so much, but having no actual rap skill, like me before. HOWEVER, if Diddy is reading this, he might sign me. He signs some garbage.

  • beiber newz

    except for the notorious B.I.G.

  • http://www.zwani.com/graphics/funny_pictures/images/88funny-pictures128.jpg JAY

    Wow, dudes in here are defending Jada….

    Jada got some crazy mic skills. And his flow is on point 98% of the time. And his vocal is so unique that you could hear 1 or 2 words and you know right away it’s J-to-the-muah… but let’s be real fellas. He ain’t no Champ. And he ain’t relevant right now. You guys are defending him like he’s KRS <– who doesn't have to stay relevant to be relevant.

    KIM <- She will forever be hip hop's champion hoe… Biggie's bitch. Maybe that's why they invited her.

    Gorilla Moe, I dunno who the ass that is and I won't even bother googling. Sounds like it might be "NSFW".

  • thrillah

    Claiming Brooklyn nigga?
    Canda is where you from Bieber,
    6’4, 230 lbs that’s only half true,
    You overweight, can’t even see your own shoe.
    5 hoes in one night?
    Handgela, is you’re only wife,
    You pay for porno, what a sad life.
    Don’t attempt to spit, you’re on that swallow tip,
    Don’t talk Baretta’s, or say hello to the hollow tip.
    When guns are drawn, they call me Killah,
    When your mom’s around, she screams out Thrillaaaaaah

  • http://www.zwani.com/graphics/funny_pictures/images/88funny-pictures128.jpg JAY

    ^ What’s “Canda”

  • http://www.zwani.com/graphics/funny_pictures/images/88funny-pictures128.jpg JAY

    Can we get Jada, Kim are the Gorilla fella to post in here? Fuck, everyone is a rapper nowadays.

  • thrillah

    Oh it’s a typo, I meant Canada you imbecile

  • beiber newz

    punk niggas wanna test me on the mic right
    thrillah in manilla, i’m ali in this light fight
    you flow like a butterfly and sweet like a bee
    i go eye for an eye if you fucking with me
    thrillah betta check it, i’ll snatch his hoe and his necklace
    cuz little did he know I cook rappers for breakfast
    don’t get it twisted, my named sorta fooled you
    ya bitch calls me thrillah, so i guess I’m a cool dude
    no swallow tip, i’m on my tiger woods shit,
    your hoe on my dick, good girl, that’s a good bitch
    only thing you killing here is your lame rap career
    my lines straight demolished you, good evening dear.

  • JBaller

    Damn! I got a new job so I haven’t been posting. Big I, you’re still the funniest poster, but I gotta admit, Bieber can spit!

  • First & Foremost

    @Jay – Dudes are trying real hard to bring back:

    If there was a summer league none of these posts would be relevant.

  • thrillah

    That shit was weak, soft
    You ain’t Tiger, but you dress like you play golf.
    Don’t call yourself Ali just cause you stutter,
    I put the knife on you like butter,
    cause you’re a waste of a bullet,
    You tried to grow a mohawk, and came out with a mullet.
    Try to go at Thrillah and came up short
    Fuckin loser, you should sue me for man slaughter and win in court.
    Stick to singing, that’s where your talent is,
    Just like your momma sounding like mariah when I give her the biz.

  • beiber newz
  • beiber newz

    you rappin there buddy but me no comprehendo
    you speaking that gibberish amigo, friendo
    we aint cool you getting played like nintendo
    you need to fall back, recognize it’s essential
    in the hood erry day, rollin weed on that sour
    looking for a bitch, so i tried your baby mama
    no coward, in her crib straight head 6 hours
    and only time i sing is when i fuck her in the shower

  • beiber newz

    thanx jballer . would it be hilarious if this WHOLE time i been disgused as a famous rapper you guy ALL KNOW. lol


    (keep it on the low)

  • thrillah

    I don’t get played, but your momma blow me like nintendo.
    Can someone tell me what the fuck’s a friendo?
    While you fabricate words,
    I’m applying lubricant for your girl.
    Yeah I smashed that,
    Dime should take your posts and trash that.
    If your name is Bieber when you surf the net,
    I’d hate to hear what they call you in the streets.

  • beiber newz

    damn i’m getting sleepy tryna look at your lame raps
    equivalent to feces, time to stop you in your main tracts.
    get it? maybe not. you stupid and you dead wrong
    i was in the streets, you was snitchin putting feds on
    bitch i neva lie, understand i fuck the latin broads
    so know i’m talking bj when i tell her get her head on.

    back to the topic, i see you a pussy when i stare through your sockets, no backbone, you a hobbit, i’m headed to the top i take off like a rocket. i got the game in the bank go lock it. so that’s why i make up words, FOCK* IT. you a focker. jake locker. just pass me the ball no homo i got her. i score the touchdowns, you just lob her, hop up off my dick mutherfucker you a schlober.

    this phony’s acting, it sounds like movie talk, cut it with the goofy talk, my raps spit flames i’m here to take your kuffi off

  • Big Island

    B.I.’s going back in…
    I can’t believe I’m gonna do this, and back my man Beib
    My raps are hella corny but I got a few tricks up my sleeve
    And shout out to JBaller, my man it’s been awhile
    so here’s a few sweet lines that are sure to make you smile
    JAY says hip hop’s hoe is Lil Kim
    I saw Trillah and a skirt, hell, I’d rather bang him
    Apply lube to Beib’s girl? You must be insane
    She’s a nice lady, sure, but she looks like Lil’ Wayne
    She’s got back hair, zits, thick glasses and 3 teeth
    she wears hefty bag skirts because she stinks like garbage underneath
    She’s really really ugly, and she’s dumb as fuck too
    Put picking on Beib’s girl Trilla gets Big Island to come through
    To be completely honest, it hit me hard when you dissed her
    Because god dammit Trilla, Beib is dating my sister.

  • beiber newz