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Featured Gallery, Overseas / Feb 7, 2012 / 11:00 am

5 Moves Allen Iverson Could Learn From Kenny Powers

Kenny Powers

We saw a few people joking around on Twitter yesterday that Allen Iverson is sort of morphing into the NBA version of Kenny Powers. For our socially inept readers, Powers is the profanity-lacing, jetski-riding, beer-drinking-while-he-drives star from HBO’s popular show, Eastbound & Down. Now with reports linking a team in Puerto Rico with Iverson, the comparison is a perfect fit. In the second season documenting Powers’ on-again, off-again baseball comeback, the most hilarious character on television spent some time creating “highlights” for a pro team in Mexico called the Charros.

So the comparison makes perfect sense (and it’s too funny to think about): two over the hill former stars that you either loved or hated attempting to rekindle the glory years by taking the road less traveled. Iverson wore out his welcome in the NBA by refusing to come off the bench and accept a diminished role. Powers wore out his welcome with pretty much every person in the world outside of Stevie. Both have had their share of highlights over the years, but I’m hoping we haven’t seen the last of Iverson (We are getting us some more Kenny Powers VERY soon).

So what does Iverson need to do to make it back? Here are five Kenny Powers’ moments that he definitely needs to replicate (and these aren’t safe for work by the way):

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5. A Training Video To Make Owners/Scouts Salivate
Why hasn’t Iverson’s team gotten on this already? We all know his talent is still there. It might not be at the level it once was, but a banged-up, older version of the former MVP still needs to be good enough for someone right? Scouts and general managers need only see that Iverson still has what it takes to count $1 bills and beat up lawn gnomes. So my advice: cut a DVD like this with a provocative title (“Allen Iverson Doesn’t Practice Basketball, It Practices Him” would work) and then seal and ship it out in mass quantities to every team/organization in the NBA.

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  • the shaman

    best show on tv

  • the shaman

    maybe best show ever

  • EN FUEGO

    Man, Hilarious shit. The first time I saw that intro, I was laughing so hard I farted. Loud.

    AI has to have a Spanish nick. Kenny was “La Flama Blanca”. “El Respuesta”…?

    And the Panocha speech… Hahaha

  • EN FUEGO

    Allen Fuckin’ Iverson!

  • Brown

    “You’re fuckin out! I’m fuckin in!”

  • LMNOP

    trouble with this is that everyone knows Kenny already stole his “no i in team” speech from iverson.

  • JDish

    This guy better watch out with them machetes, I don’t think this guy is going to be Ok after flayling away and waving those things around like that. Put those things away bro before you hurt yourself LOL! Your too close to showing us how NOT to make a training vid.

    So Dime, let me get this straight. So I’m socially inept … and I’m watching some fat wanna-be baseball player making a “training” vid. Don’t get wrong, I know its just a show and it is funny.

  • RonNation

    Jdish str8 awful post all around

  • JDish

    My Bad. Anyway Dime can take my post off this wall.