Friday the 13th used to be known for harmless bad luck, but thanks to a psycho with a hockey mask and every movie studio deciding they have to release horror flicks on that date, now it’s become synonymous with blood and torture. Always thinking marketing, the NBA had its bases covered last night, Friday the 13th — giving a lot of unlucky fans a lineup of boring blowouts that were murder on the eyes … It was so bad we resorted to math: The average margin of victory for last night’s 12 NBA games was 15.6 points; four games reached 20-piece status; and one of them was a 38-point laugher that shockingly involved the Wizards … If you had to pick a headliner, it would’ve been Suns/Rockets. While there were playoff implications — Houston is clinging to one of the last postseason spots in the West and Phoenix wants it — ESPN’s announcers were trying too hard to sell it. We’ve never heard “playoff atmosphere” so often during a game that, well, didn’t have one … Phoenix led by five in crunch time before Steve Nash drew a charge on Courtney Lee, then dimed Jared Dudley on a three-pointer that made it an eight-point game with 36 seconds left. That should’ve been the dagger, but Luis Scola and his flopping genius kept it interesting. (Flopping Genius sounds like a garage band.) Scola was setting a screen on Marcin Gortat to free Chase Budinger for a trey, flopped to draw a foul on Gortat and fell back into Budinger, almost tearing Air Bud’s knee to shreds. OK, so the knee thing probably wasn’t part of the plan. The refs awarded Budinger three free throws, even though he wasn’t actually fouled by anyone, and he made them all to bring the Rockets back in range. Too bad Nash (18 pts, 10 asts) tends not to miss his late-game free throws either, because that was as close as the Rockets would get … Following high-profile losses to the Celtics and Bulls, the Heat needed a punching bag to get their swagger back. Cue the Bobcats walking into Miami’s gym like an ambitious young blonde walking into an elevator with Bobby Petrino and Bill Clinton, unaware they’re about to be ruined … Even Dexter Pittman went off in Miami’s rout, scoring a season-high 16 off the bench. LeBron had a breezy 19 points and Chris Bosh chipped in 18, while D-Wade sat out … The Pacers stomped the Cavs behind Danny Granger‘s 18 points in the second part of a home-and-home series. The first meeting was as forgettable as this one, except in that one, Cleveland’s mascot Moondog got injured while play-fighting with Dave West. That was dumb. Of all the guys on Indiana’s roster, West is the last one we’d even pretend to fight. He’s the type of dude who wakes up on Christmas morning with a scowl on his face after eye-gouging Santa Claus the night before … Hit the jump to read about Kevin Durant settling a playground dispute.
Smack / Apr 14, 2012 / 3:05 am
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